Oh God Not Again!

Chapter Twenty Six

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter.

Note: Okay, this caused a lot of confusion, so…Snape trying to kill Sirius isn't ever mentioned in the books, but given their almost incredible level of animosity even twelve years later, it isn't too much of a stretch to think that should they ever meet in battle, they would immediately go after the other. Also, I updated! Yay!

Despite himself, Harry quite enjoyed the impromptu all-night 'The School Is No Longer At Risk And We Didn't Even Have To Do Anything' party immediately following everyone's departure from Dumbledore's office. It was a bit late notice, but that was nothing more than cause for both anxiety and celebration for the Hogwarts House Elves.

As Harry had quite a flair for the dramatic, it was only natural that he was a gifted story-teller and so the entire student body seemed quite eager to hear Harry's tale, none more so than the thrill-seeking Gryffindors. He delighted in regaling his housemates with the official version of the tale – to Ginny's great annoyance – and only stopped when it came time for points to be announced.

The minute Dumbledore started listing the current point tallies, Harry ran like his life depended on it to the Slytherin table again. Glancing at Harry oddly, Dumbledore nonetheless continued his recitation, "In first place we have Gryffindor House with 638 points. In second place, we have Slytherin with 427 points. In third place we have Ravenclaw with 383 points. And in fourth place we have Hufflepuff with 358 points." No one was particularly surprised by this news. It had become quite clear early on this year, if not by the end of last year, that – despite his best efforts – Harry Potter was simply not capable of losing the House Cup. What happened next did surprise people quite a bit.

"Congratulations, Gryffindor, and well done," Dumbledore beamed in Harry's general direction. "But before you start celebrating, recent events must be taken into consideration. This has been a very trying year for all of us, working to keep the unfortunate basilisk infestation and inconvenient hospitalizations out of the paper. Had the Board of Governors or the Ministry gotten word of this before it was taken care of…well, I shudder to think of what might have happened then. However, I'm pleased to inform you that the basilisk has been defeated by Professor Lockhart and three exceptional students. In light of this, I have a few last-minute points to distribute."

"Not again!" a Ravenclaw upperclassman who Harry only vaguely recognized groaned. There were several murmurs of agreement from various other non-Gryffindors, which the Headmaster blithely ignored.

"First, to Ms. Luna Lovegood and Ms. Ginevra Weasley for remaining calm and collected in a hostage situation, as well as assisting with catching the perpetrator, I award Gryffindor andRavenclaw each 200 points." Dumbledore paused here, clearly expecting applause, but everyone was too stunned at a non-Gryffindor garnering some last-minute points to do anything but stare at him. "And to Mr. Harry Potter for his quick-thinking, resourcefulness, selflessness, responsibility in alerting a faculty member, and bravery, I award Gryffindor 400 points."

"I don't believe it," Harry moaned dejectedly. "I mean, I do, but I wish I didn't. 600 extra points…that's, what, 1238? This almost DOUBLED our points. I know I'm supposed to be Dumbledore's favorite student and all, but it sure doesn't seem like it sometimes…"

"I can't believe it," Draco echoed Harry's sentiment. "A Ravenclaw coming in second place? Slytherin in third? I think I'm in shock. Or maybe this is all one big long nightmare…maybe this whole year is just one never-ending nightmare. I probably got a concussion on the train when you and the Weasel fell from the sky any minute now I'll wake up in the Hospital Wing."

"Amen to that," Harry said fervently.

"You know," Daphne Greengrass said thoughtfully. "I've just noticed that every year, it always comes down to either Gryffindor or Slytherin winning the House Cup and Ravenclaw maybe coming in second, depending on how good their Quidditch team is. Or depending on whether or not one of them goes along with the Headmaster's pet student's annual suicide attempt. Why is it that Ravenclaw and Hufflepuff never win? I mean, obviously they are less likely to engage in the foolish heroics that is the Gryffindor claim to fame or strategizing, like we do, but you'd think it would happen every once in a while."