Dear Girls of Wattpad,
I don't know about you but when I'm "talking" to someone or "dating," I generally get worried that I am smothering them too much. You feel the same way too? Well lucky for you, and me, I've unlocked how this thing goes and because I love all of you I'm going to give you some meaningful advice on how you can steer clear of suffocating your relationship.
1. TELL THEM BEFOREHAND!
No matter who you like whether it's a guy, girl, horse, or shoe be sure to tell them upfront if you are the 'talk to you every day' type. OKAY, STOP! Before you roll those eyes and exit out, throwing out a scoff or two, I swear on my marbles this works. Telling the person early on helps because the person knows exactly what comes with the package and can expect this. If you don't know if you're a phone clinger than ask some friends or exes. Ask your mother, ask your dads, ask your great grandma Becky! Ask someone because someone is bound to know a little something about your qualities. My guess, you've been down this rodeo more than once and know what I'm talking about.
2. ASK!
Ask your interest if they feel smothered in any way. Ladies, this never hurts. You can always tell how the relationship goes by the honesty the other tells. They might say something like, "Yeah Babe, no offense but you have been a little close lately." REMEMBER, the person doesn't want to hurt you, they just need some good ole' fashioned space. If they wanted to hurt you they would have broken up with you already. You don't need to fear asking your special someone something because usually it will benefit your relationship.
3. DO NOT BE AFRAID OF SPACE!
Let's face it girls, when a guy asks for space it's kind of a touchy subject for us tampon users. Girls immediately become the smaller version of hulk and demand a reason why. Then we come up with an ultimatum that sounds something like this, "Well if you want space YOU can have it! WE'RE DONE!!!!" In the end, this makes the other person furious, throw in some cuss words and negativity and baddah Bing badda boom! Instant break up and you're left wondering what you did wrong. Well, "cough cough," you turned into hulk! Soooo, STOP cringing at the word space. Tell the person the definition of space as well. Just because you have space does not mean you can be with anyone else. It means you are still committed to me and need some time to think things through. Remember ladies, this is not a "hall pass," this is only used for thinking purposes, for lack of a better word. He cannot put the works on that hot dog and still expect your spicy brown mustard.
4. Lean yourself away from talking to them too much.
If it's to the extreme, lean yourself away from them as much. Ladies do not become dependent on their text messages. Remind yourself that space makes a better relationship. Trust that they are doing nothing wrong when they aren't talking to you. If you can’t trust them, then why are you in a relationship with them? Only pick this option if YOU choose it, not anyone else. It has to be your decision because the temptation is large. You are probably going to have your phone off for the first few days. Do not feel obligated to do this though.
5. DROP THEM!
I know you're probably thinking that I'm crazy by now, but seriously? You should have learned that long ago. This should be the first option, but if they can't stand your clingy ways then someone else will. Ladies, we should only mold our shape by OUR OWN hands, not anyone else's. The above is helpful but in the end you have to accept your flaws. If your love interest cannot accept your infatuation in them then they probably aren't the one. More than less, people who are interested want to talk to you every day and find out more about you, like some love sick puppy that lost they're tale. They want to know everything, your favorite color, favorite food, favorite bleach, etc. The list goes on. Don't become scared if you feel as though you’re desperate, embrace it! Don't become like the psycho girlfriend on YouTube but embrace your feelings. But hey, if you're like her than all props to you for embracing it full force. It’s time to show our loves that they got another thing coming! No matter counting how many texts they sent and how many I did. No more nervously awaiting their reply seconds after you sent yours. No more being scared of being YOU! This is a new generation that calls on you to show your love interest whose boss!
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Stay tuned and stay beautiful!
Love,
missflawed<3
Aka Siena (:
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