Moving Forward

2018

Author's note: Welcome to the companion piece of my trilogy. Most of the chapters will be pretty short, but some will be longer for sure and will take place during the 18 missing years at the end of the trilogy (Wounds of the Soul/Wound of the Spirit/Long Way home).

If you haven't read the stories, you can still read this and enjoy the fluffy moments of Barry becoming a surrogate and a real dad to adorable children. Just know that long story short, in the trilogy, Barry got kidnapped and tortured for a long time and, during that time, he grew really close to another prisoner, Matt. Matt got kidnapped while his wife was pregnant with their 3rd child and he died before he could see his baby, Lindy. Plus, Barry eventually goes home and heal all his physical and mental wounds thanks to a woman he came to love as a sister, a healing Metahuman called Olivia, who ended up sacrificing herself to save his life.

I hope you'll enjoy the cute moments!

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The sound of footsteps entering the lab barely made it to the speedster's ears as he was sitting on the cold Cortex's floor and facing the end of the room where both his and Olivia's suits were on display.

"I knew I would find you here," came Joe's sympathetic voice.

Of course, Iris would call him. It wasn't surprising considering the way the speedster rambled about not feeling well and needing some air before leaving the party in a hurry. Lindy's first birthday party.

"Why did Amanda even invite me and Iris? We shouldn't be there. Matt should've been there and this girl should be with her family," slowly said Barry, bringing his knees closer to his upper body as he spoke without breaking eye contact with the blue suit that used to belong to his friend.

Joe sighed deeply and grunted as his older body protested slightly when he went down to the floor to join his surrogate son.

"Barr, you are part of her family now. You're gonna need to grasp that fact."

For the first time in the conversation, Barry looked up at his foster dad with tears in his eyes, "that girl is one year old, Joe. You didn't see her; she's walking now and she's starting to talk. Soon, she's going to interact more and more with other kids and realize most families have two parents and she's going to start asking questions about her dad. I'm not him. I'm an impostor. Matt is her real father. "

Joe frowned, looking dead serious as he pronounced the next words, "so, what you're saying is that I'm an impostor?"

Barry's mouth opened up, first in confusion, until the realization of his words sank in and his eyes widened, forcing him to swiftly shake his head, "it's not what I meant. It's not the same thing, I'm-"

"You're not Lindy's father, I get that. Just like I'm not yours," said Joe with a serious expression on his face, just enough to make the hero nervous and wondering if he had really insulted Joe without wanting to.

"It's not like that," Barry tried to correct himself, "it's not the same thing. Lindy has her mother and her aunt. And, she would have her dad too, had I been more careful and prepared one year ago."

The hero looked down at the floor for a moment before looking up once more, looking at Olivia's suit. Softening his features, Joe took a more compassionate expression as he softly added, "look, her aunt lives in Keystone with her own family and can't always drop everything to help her sister with every day's issues. You, on the other hand, barely lives a couple of blocks away. You can help Amanda and you have, many times, during the last year. You don't have to be blood to be family. I thought you would know that by now."

It was with a bittersweet smile on his lips that Barry answered, "yeah, I guess I do. I just miss Matt. I just miss them," he said, looking at the empty suit and trying not to tear up too much.

Gently, Joe laid his arm around the younger man's shoulders and gently drew him closer, "I know you do, Barr."

Failing at keeping his emotions at bay, the man felt tears slowly cascading down his cheeks, "I can't believe it's almost been a full year, I just wish it would stop hurting."

"You can't let your past drag you down, Barr. Matthew and Olivia will always be part of you, but they're gone now. I never knew the real Matthew, but the way you spoke about him and from the time I go to spend with Olivia I know that if they were here right now they would want you to keep going, keep living and growing. Lindy can't have her dad back, but she's still gonna need a strong rock in her life. She's gonna need someone with her, in the present, not someone who lives in the past."

Barry swallowed the lump in his throat and closed his eyes while he was working to get his emotions back under his control. Joe was right, he always was. How could someone be this strong despite everything that happened in his life?

"I wish I was as strong as you," whispered Barry as his head lay resting against his foster dad's shoulder.

"You're stronger than you give yourself credit for, Barr. Don't try to be Matthew. Don't try to be Matthew's replacement. Just be yourself. Be the person you know you are and the person Matt and Olivia saw in you and cared about so much that they gave everything for you. Just be that person for everyone in your life and be the strong man I know you are. And, when you'll falter, we'll all be there for you, we're not going anywhere."

Taking a deep breath, Barry smiled softly and looked up one last time at the blue and white suit. Yeah, he could do it. He was going to do it, He was going to be a great husband to his wife Iris, a great hero to the town and everything Amanda and Lindy needed of him.

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A/N: It's different from my usual evilness, I hope you still love it. Let me know in the comments! Gonna upload more next week