My Mysterious Boyfriend (Larry Stylinson)

f i v e

Louis Tomlinson

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I went home sobbing. I couldn't take it anymore. Niall is dying over there. I couldn't get to the fact that I'm gonna lose him. My aunt died in front of me. In front of me!

I couldn't help him. Shit, I couldn't even help myself. He's simply lying down at the hospital bed, While I was here standing heal- physical healthy.

I rushed to the bathroom and closed the dooor. I'm gonna do it again. To make my pain go away

"Do it!"

"Cut yourself"

"You don't deserve to live!"

"Join your parents"

"Go to hell"

"Cut!"

"You little piece of shit just do it!"

The voices were here again. They're always here. But every time I'm depressed, they're even louder. I can't even make them stop. I just have to live to the fact they're always here.

I sobbed as I put my hands to my ears, somewhat to cover the voices. "Li-Li? Zee are-are you there?" I sobbed as I called their names. They should be here by this time. "Li-Li?" I asked again my voice being a bit hoarse. 

"Liam? Zayn?" I panicked. I need someone right now. Anyone. They should be here by this time of the day. They promised me to be here before noon. Where are they?

"Just do it Louis!"

"To let the pain go away."

A tear escaped from my eye as I simply nodded. Agreeing to the voices. I scrambled my jelly legs to the closet were I keep my stuff. I opened the closet as I grabbed a scissor.

Here goes nothing. I gulped as I placed the blade to my arms, with shaky hands I simply slashed my arms.

I grasped into it as I repeated it again at different parts of my arms. I closed my eyes as a tear escaped my eyes again. I simply repeated it as I deepen the blade to my skin.

It tore my skin open, a trail of dark red blood oozing out of my skin quickly. 

I made a cut for being useless in life, another one for being a nobody and some other cuts for being an insane person.

I dropped my body to my knees, crying to the sadness built up in my weal body. I don't deserve to live. I don't deserve to brethe. A lot of people deserves to live, but not just me.

I'm such a loser. 

I threw the scissor to the ground as it make a clanking sound as it hits a tile. I curled up to a ball sobbing. Feeling the guilt that was built up in the pit of my stomach.