l i b r a r y ➣ exo

🥀r e g r e t - k.jn🥀

Jongin x Reader

His fingers were tightly wrapped around your wrist as you once more tried to jerk his hand off, but his hold was stronger than you and so he didn't let go. Your back was facing him as you refused to look at him in the eyes. You didn't think you could handle looking at him after what he had done. You were hurt, your heart was painfully throbbing inside of your chest and there was a lump in your throat as you for the tenth time swallowed down the need to cry and blinked away the stinging tears.

You couldn't believe that you had been naive enough to fall into his trap. He was a playboy, how could you have ever expected for him to change for you? How could you have ever illuded yourself that you could change him at all? You couldn't help but feel stupid and angry at yourself, why would you have been any different from all the other girls? You had been just another one of his puppets.

"Jongin, let me go!" You shrieked and tried once again to rip his grip off.

"Y/n please listen to me-" he pleaded, in his voice was desperation as he tugged you back towards him, but you still wouldn't face him.

"Why would I listen to you? After all the lies you've thrown at me I'm supposed to listen to you know?! Oh please." you burst and finally managed to tear his hand from yours and faced him, your eyes dark and void, whilst hs were filled with regret and pain.

"Look I understand that you're angry because of what I've done- but Y/n, that bet might not have been serious, but my feelings for you are,"

You couldn't deny the sincerity in his voice and you would've have forgiven him if it wasn't for the pain that was still consuming you on the inside. Your heart was crumbling and your hands kept trembling, there was no trust left for him. You had hesitated to give into him at first but with time the two of had gotten closer to each other and you had gotten the chance to warm up to him. You had felt happy to have him, happy. The real meaning of happiness. Your heart would beat with excitement every time you'd see him, a smile growing on your face whenever he occupied your thoughts.

It was different now though, everything he would bring you was pain and suffering, his name the source of your tears, no matter how much you wanted to forgive him, no matter how much you wanted to trust him again, it was impossible. The whole you would restrain you from doing so, and so you realized that ending this was going to be the best choice.

Instead of answering you turned around, making him face your back again while your fingers balled into fists, your head slightly tilted to the side.

"There is no way we're ever going to work if you aren't honest from the very beginning," you muttered lowly, loud enough for him to hear, and without waiting for an answer you started walking away from him. Walking out of his life.

Or that was what you thought, suddenly there were two strong arms embracing you from behind, your back hitting a hard chest as your senses were immediately hit with the familiar scent that you had learned to adore so much, and it took you all of yourself to not lean into his touch. Because even if you still loved him, you could never trust him again, and a relationship without trust was never going to last. This wasn't just for you, but for him as well, if he really loved you like he said, it would be for the best if everything would end there because you would never be capable of giving him what was required.

Your teeth bit down onto your lip to stop a sob from leaving your lips as you gently grabbed his hands and pulled them away from you, your head hanging slightly low as you said your last words to him.

"Goodbye Jongin, perhaps we may go back to the start in the future, and do this properly."

oooh, angsty,