Broken Hearts//Grayson Dolan fan-fiction.

4. Feelings

Chapter Four

I was in the middle of one of those strange dreams I usually have,when my mom's voice woke me up.

'Alexis baby,time to go,you're gonna be late.'

'Okay,okay,I'm up!'I told her and opened my eyes heavily.

I hate waking up early so much,I always am in a bad mood when I don't get enough sleep and my under eye dark circles are even worse.

I sighed and got out of bed instantly walking in the bathroom,I need to pee really bad and then wash my face and brush my hair.

I don't know why but today I wanted to look pretty,I honestly have no idea what has gotten into me.I don't even wear makeup,like ever..But somehow today,after I washed my face and brushed my hair,I applied a little but of power,mascara and a lip balm to look a bit presentable,than usual.

I covered my dark circles with a concealer and when I looked in the mirror I just felt weird.Maybe I'm doing all this for him,that maybe I'll see him at school today and he'll see me too and I,for once,will be looking like a normal seventeen year old girl.

I hate myself for doing this,I know it's not even a big deal for many girls,to wear makeup..but it is to me,I never wear makeup and trust me even a simple lip balm will be noticeable on my face,I'm already regretting this.

I sighed again and shook my head,well it is what it is.I have to get dressed and have breakfast before I go to school.

I decided to wear simple dark blue jeans,with one side ripped on the knee and a grey hoodie over it and put on my high top vans.I just let my hair down and took my backpack and ran downstairs.

'Hurry up Alexis,your dad is waiting for you in the car already.'Said mom and handed me my lunch.Luckily she didn't realize I had some makeup on or she would've started saying how much I have grown up and that I'm starting to look like a woman,it would be embarrassing.

I grabbed an apple so I wouldn't starve until lunch since I can't have breakfast right now,because I'm beyond late.I know this seems healthy but trust me it's just today because we didn't have anything else to take to school,my mom probably made me sandwiches for lunch.

I'm not healthy at all and you can tell that just by looking at my body,but that doesn't mean I'm overweight or something,I just have a bit curvy body with thick thighs and you could say I have good sized boobs and butt,I really don't have anything to be ungrateful.

I got in the backseat of my dad's car,hoping he wouldn't see my in makeup as well,but I guess he did.

'Hey since when do you wear makeup?'He asked me and I sighed in annoyance.

'It's not makeup dad,it's just..what's wrong with it anyway?'

'I never said there was something wrong with it,I simply asked one question.'He shrugged.

'Whatever.'I shook my head.

After fifteen minutes of driving I was finally at school,I saw Kassidi waiting for me in the yard and I waved at her.

'Wow Lexi!Is that you?'She said when she came closer.

'Just shut up,please don't make a big deal out of it.'I glared at her.

'Fine,fine,I'm just shook.'She said smiling.

'Ugh..'

'Hey it looks good on you.'

'Thank you Kas,but still,don't make any comments on it.'

'Alright.'She said and we walked in the school.

The first class I had was maths and I hated it,I never listened and to be honest I didn't understand it very well.First few classes would be boring I knew it,but I was looking forward to seeing Grayson during lunch or in biology class,which we had together.

Lunchtime came pretty quickly,that was because I was distracted the whole day,lots of thoughts crossed my mind and I didn't pay attention during the classes.Luckily I didn't have to,because I was invisible,like I always am.

Being invisible is good for me if you ask,because you're never in the middle of high school drama and this felt good enough.

I entered the cafeteria with Kassidi,we always had lunch together,sometimes a few other people joined us too,the ones who I would say are the closest thing to a friend.

Today it was just Kassidi and I,we sat near the entrance,because this was the most quiet place here and it was far from those popular kids of the school,this was the easiest way to avoid getting in the center of anyone's attention.

'What's your next class?'Kassidi asked taking a bite of her sandwich.

'Biology.'I answered and did the sam,I was starving.

'Oh,so you're having a class with Mr.Dolan himself.'She said smiling like a mad girl.

'Yea whatever Kas.'I shrugged.

'Um excuse you,why do you never talk about him?C'mon you guys used to be a thing.'She almost screamed and I kicked her leg under the table.

'Kassidi shut the fuck up,please.'

'Okay,sorry,but still why?'

'It was nothing and you know it,I don't want to talk about him,look there are plenty of other guys around us.'I said hoping she would stop talking about Grayson and I.

'Yeah that's true,you should really talk to Lucas,he always talks to me about you.'Said Kassidi.

Lucas was Kassidi's friend and they hung out a lot,everyone would think they're a couple but Kassidi is a lesbian so she has a lot more guy friends than girl friends,I think Jenna and I are her only girl friends,but since Jenna moved to San Diego,that makes me her only girl friend here.

'Yeah I guess you're right.'I nodded.

'Lex a lot of guys like you and you know that but for some reason you never give anyone a chance.'

'I don't feel like having a serious or not serious relationship right now,I feel alright the way I am,alone,single.Besides all guys are assholes,sooner or later,they'll break your heart.'I tried to sound like I was joking but this was the truth.

'That's why you should be a lesbian.'Kassidi said and we both laughed.

We continued eating our sandwiches and laughing about some lesbian jokes,until Kassidi kicked me under the table and I almost choked on my sandwich.

'Oh my god is that Elena Gilbert?!'She said and I looked back to see the Elena and Grayson walking together.

'Since when are they a thing?'Kassidi whispered to me.

'I don't know nor do I care,can we please leave?'I asked Kassidi and stood up.

'But why?We were just having lunch.'

'Please Kas,I'm full.'I said biting my lip.

'Fine.'She stood up and we left the cafeteria.

Just when I was leaving I decided to look back just for one damned second and that's when I saw Grayson looking at me,I couldn't read what his expression said but he quickly looked away,smirking at Elena.

'I thought you were over him!'Kassidi whisper-yelled me when we left the cafeteria.

'I am Kassidi!I just hate her.'I said without looking at her.

And without saying a word I left her standing in the hallway,I knew she wouldn't understand what I felt,nobody would.