7 Minutes in Heaven | Grayson Dolan

11:51

reese

(fifth minute)

two more minutes, then our time here together will be over. i feel his hand around my fingers as i ask him the question. he blinks slowly, smiling. i smile back at him.

he is beautiful, not a single ounce of doubt in me. he is an angel, funny, caring, perfect for a broken human like me. but i am afraid that he will eventually see me the way i see myself.

ugly. stupid. and easier; broken.

we like complete opposites, like the north pole and the south pole. two different ends. we complete each other though, starting at one side and finishing at another. i should stop putting myself down because of a boy.

"i would. i will, essie.", he nods and i smile. hugging him again, i can hear his heart race at 180 bpm. i must have an affect on him, just like he has on myself.

how could i connect with him so well? was it because of his anxiety and his behavior? he was a stranger to me a while ago, and i now trust him more than my closest friends that i have known for almost 4 years.

wasn't that slightly spooky but heartwarming? i didn't want to admit it at first but i think i now have to. i love him. fuck, i actually do.

i used to say that love was a word that was overrated and used too often without thinking about it. i used to compare it with 'hate'. we were taught that hate is a strong word and shouldn't be used that often.

wasn't love exactly the same? love is a very strong word, stronger than hate itself, yet we still use it as if it were normal to love that much.

but i couldn't help but find myself loving this stranger. i loved with all my heart, and it hurt to admit it. he doesn't deserve someone like me.

"gray, thank you.", i whisper into the darkness that surrounds us. the candlelight flickers and i smile at him. he takes my face in his hands, leaning down towards me.

does he want to kiss me that bad? i cannot let him do that to himself. loving me? that must be torture. i turn my face to the side and his lips hit my cheek.

they're trembling and warm as they come in contact with my skin. i whimper into myself. i could've not turned my head. they felt really good on me.

i can feel grayson's disappointment as he pulls back and plays with a loose strand of his basketball shorts. i glance at his thigh. i knew he had tattoos, they made him look extremely intimidating, but i wondered what they symbolized.

"the moon.", i accidentally say and gray chuckles. i have an urge to touch it. he pulls his shorts higher so i can see it better. "this?", he asks and i nod like a little girl. he takes my hand and puts it on top, like he read my mind.

"do you know kid cudi?", he asks me and i try to think about it for a second. the name seemed very familiar. "oh, isn't that the singer who sang 'Day'N'Nite'?", i ask him. he smiles, nodding.

"this one's a picture of one of his albums. it got me through a rough patch, i guess.". he explains to little excited me and i listen attentively to what he has to tell me.

if there was a word to describe the connection we both had to each other, it would most likely be 'soul mates'. i knew what he was thinking, what he was going to do and the same applies to him.

he just knew.

"this one,", he continues, pointing to one reading 'myself' and 'everything'. "this one was kind of weird to get and my twin made fun of me sometimes.

i look at it and see the little dots. he must've... "i poked it myself.", he says out of my head and i snap my head up, looking into his eyes. they glimmered and i blink.

"i think i know what it means.", i say and he raises an eyebrow questioning. "be yourself through everything.", i state and his jaw drops. i giggle and lift his chin so his mouth shuts again.

"you're the first person to guess that.", he admits and i shrug sarcastically and wipe off nonexistent dirt off of my shoulders. "i'm a pro.", i joke and we both crack up into a fit of genuine laughs.

when we regain ourselves, he holds my hand and looks at me intensely, as if i were the rosetta stone. "do you have any, because something is telling me you do.", he whispers and i pout.

"who?", i ask and he knocks on his temple. "it's something biologists like to call brain. i call it grayson.", he smiles goofily. i roll up my sleeve, revealing a couple of my scars and a black splotch of ink.

"don't judge me please, gray.", i beg as he takes my arm and traces my scars. he gasps softly but gulps after that. "was this you?", he asks, looking at the circular shaped ones by my wrist.

"oh, that? that was my foster father.", i say and snaps his head up. there's a broken expression scattered onto his beautiful face and i swear, i pity myself, which hurts.

"he belongs in prison!", he yelps and i sigh. "don't, grayson.", i say. he looks back down at my arm and takes a closer look at my tattoo. "stitches. is it symbolic or just.", he spins his hand around in the air, looking for the right word.

"wow. i thought you were my soul mate.", i think out loud. i don't even realize it until gray lets me go and stares at me. "you can fix yourself, no matter what happens.", he chokes and i look at him in disbelief.

"how did you-", i want to begin but he puts his right pointer finger over my lips and makes me fall silent. his mouth twitches into a smile and i can see his dimples appear.

"soul mates know."

☁︎

a/n;
reese is me. i love grayson with all of my heart. man, that hurts to admit sometimes.

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xx,cece