Is this love?

Chapter 29

Standing at K.P grave I finally felt at peace with myself. I was accepting the fact that I'll never see her again. It had been two weeks since I was discharge from the hospital. I had almost bleed to death because I push myself too hard after my C-Section, ripping out my stitches cause me to almost died from losing to much blood. Whiles I was there I had a few sessions with Karen and she suggested I come here and say my goodbye to K.P before I leave for Paris. Karen was afraid I'd blame K.P's death on myself. But when I told her I think I saw someone looking like K.P after the Funeral, well she thinks my mind is trying to cope with K.P's death in the wrong way. By still believing there's a possibility that she didn't died. She make me look at pictures of K.P in her coffin, to help me process that she's really gone. The finish part was for me to say goodbye to her, here before Paris.

Nash and I had agree to get married in Paris after Antonia pleaded with us for days. She thinks its the most romantic thing ever, getting marry in the city of love.

“Nessa"

“Yeah"

“What are you thinking about so hard" Raven ask me. To tell you the truth I had forgotten she was here with me.

“Nothing much just saying goodbye before we leave"

I bend down and rest my purple roses on K.P's grave and turn away quickly before walking back to the waiting car. I knew she was gone and I'll miss her for a long time but I had to move on.

I took out my phone and text Nash as I wait for Raven in the car. He and our children were already at the airport waiting for me. We were spending the summer in France, mainly Paris much to Antonia delight. Raven entered the car and the driver pulled off heading to the airport.

“I'm going to miss you so much" she said hugging me.

“You are coming out in a month time right" I asked eyeing her.

“Yes as soon as this murder case finishes, I'm starting to regret taking on this client anyway. He's becoming very demanding. And to top it off I have to live in a hotel for a month"

“Hey it's one of the best in San Francisco and I told my staff to treat you like a queen."

“I know, I know. Ignore me I'm jealous of you. Beside being on vocation for three months you get to spend it with Elisha and Elijah. I'm going to miss those cute monsters most of all."

“I know right" I hug her again. She had been under a lot of stress lately, this case she has been working was very public, and reporters have been harassment her plus the hate mails. To top it off her client was really, really demanding. I'm just glad in a few weeks she'll join us in Paris and she'll get to relax. Our home was being redecorated the top floor was being turn unto a suite for my family. Plus the foyer where K.P had died needs to be change. I told my decorator that I want to walk into the room and not recognize it.

The car stop in front of the airport and I give Raven a last hug and kiss on her cheek before getting out of the car. A few reporters surround the car and started shouting questions at Raven. I blow her a kiss before my bodyguards swept me away.

Enter our jet I when straight to my little boys and kiss them. Nash and I had name them Elijah and Elisha. I had four kids with matching names and Nash and Nessa was kind of match too. Kyanna can't stop teasing us.

“Come on Nessa buckle up let's get out of here." Kyanna said clapping her hand so that I'll hurry. I took a seat next to Nash and stick out my tongue at her.

“Could you two be anymore childish" Luke snapped at both of us.

“Shut up Luke" we both snapped back at him. “Your just angry because I'm forcing you to take a vocation" I said to him.

“Damn right I'm mad, three months of doing nothing and you didn't even allow Kelly to come with us"

“I need her to stay, to run my company Luke and she understands that"

We were in the air by this time.

“I need a drink, something strong if I have to survive this flight with her here" he said pointing to Kyanna.

I got up from my seat and when into the bedroom to check on Tonia and Tonio, as they had ask me to start calling them. Luke and Kyanna had start their bickering and I needed to get away from them before I strangle one of them.

“Mom why are they not doing anything?" Tonia asked. Just as I was about to answer Tonio reply.

“They're babies they don't do much"

I smile at him, his birthday was close he was getting sixteen. Almost a man, now. I plan on flying out his friends from school and those from Montana and throw him a huge party.

“I  love you guys" I said looking at them.

“Aww mom come on, we're big now. No more I love you please" complaints Tonia.

“Mom you could do all the sappy emotions in private and I might even let you hug me but please don't do that in public" Tonio said. I stuck out my hand to shake his, when he had place his in mine, we shake.

“It's a deal then" I smile happily at him.

“Mom when you smile like that you just makes me feel afraid of the deal we make. You're not going to keep doing this till I'm like twenty, are you?"

“At twenty we'll negotiate another deal, besides at that time you'll be CEO of James Industries."

“Really mom?" He asked excitedly.

I nod and smile at him.

“Wait! Why does he gets to be CEO what about me?"

“Well you'll be on the board of directors along with me and your Aunt Raven. Then there's Nash and Kyanna since we have decided to merge both companies. Tonio will have to answer to the board at annual meetings so you'll kind of be his boss" I said smiling at her and giving Tonio a secret wink.

She started dancing around and singing “I'm going to be your boss, your boss."

Leaving them I walk back out to Nash and the other. As I was about to take my seat Nash pulls me into his lap and kiss me.

“When Tonia gets older she's going to realize you lied to her"

“I didn't lie" I denied hotly. “I did say kind of be his boss"

“How did it go?" he asked softly, changing the subject. He wraped his arms around me, pulling me closer into him. I inhale his scent and settle myself on his lap. God I really love this man sometimes I wonder how did I get so lucky. To experience such amazing love, I use to lie in bed and question Is this love. It's more then love deep in my soul I feel for this man.

“Nessa?" He said gently nudging me. I hadn't answer his question. I knew immediately he wasn't really asking how it my visit went, what he really wanted to know was how was I feeling.

“I'm always going to be sad about her dying but I'm okay with it. If you understand what I mean."

“I do understand" he said kissing me softly on the lips.

“We should both go in and rest, it's going to be a long flight."

I stood and wait for him as he walk up to the cockpit to inform the pilot and air hostess that we were all going to rest. When he returned he took my hands and we both went into the cabin to sleep.