Kissed and Healed (Matthew Espinosa Fanfic)

Chapter 22

Soundtrack for this chapter:

Treacherous- Taylor Swift

Sad Beautiful Tragic- Taylor Swift

Renee's pov:

The rest of the car ride was really nice. We took turns driving and would quite often take small naps. I enjoyed just talking to Matthew. Sharing laughs and sharing smiles. It was until we pulled off to the side of the road and Matthew spilled it all out. He stepped out of the car and leaned up against the back of the car. I stood in front of him.

"Renee, there's something...I can't really hold it in any longer."

I looked at him in fear of what he could say. He placed his hand oh my leg and gave it a small rub in comfort. He bit his lip and continued on.

"Renee, I may have already said this, but I feel the need to say it again. You are the love of my life. You are the first thing I think about when I wake up. And I know it sounds cheesy, but it's so weirdly true. You're so physically beautiful, but there's your heart and your soul that makes you beautiful on the inside. I couldn't lose that heart of yours. I would be lost without you. That's why I came here. That's why I went out of my way to see the one I love. I've never done that for someone, but I love you too much to know that you were in pain. Do you know how much it hurt to say goodbye to you? Do you know how much I took that last hug for granted? I appriciated that last hug. I appriciated everything about feeling your arms wrapped around me. Because in that moment, I thought it was our last. The thought of not seeing you for a long time was miserable. When you walked away, it's as if you were promising yourself not to look back. I just wanted to see your face once more, but I knew I couldn't. After all the times we had, it was thrown away. It was such a treacherous love that we both knew would just end up getting broken. I didn't want you to go. In that moment, I didn't have the courage to say that, but now I do. Renee Anne Harper, I am crazily, magically, amazingly, happily yet sadly in love with you. You've given me the best love I could ever ask for. Now that you're with me again, I remember how much I missed you. I missed you before you were even gone. I love you."

"Matthew...All I ever really wanted was for you to love me. I mean of course there are other important things, but I never knew how much I loved you until you were actually mine. Falling in love has always been a dangerous path for me. With love, there's pain. But Matthew Lee Espinosa, falling in love with you is worth the risk. Leaving you and wondering if I'd ever see you again was one of the biggest and saddest mysteries I've ever gone through."

Matthew and I had no words after that. Just actions. I know we'd already shared many kisses, but I couldn't get enough. Matthew placed his hands on my hips and leaned back against the car. I took a step closer to him as his grip around me tightened. I stood on my tippy toes and rested my hands on his shoulders. He kissed me sweetly.

*A few hours later*

We had finally gotten back to Virginia and the first thing I wanted to do was see my mom. Matthew said his goodbyes and dropped me off. I didn't even know if my mom knew I was coming back. I brought my bags in and searched throughout the house to find her. It took me awhile until I finally found her in her bedroom. She was uner her covers fast asleep in her bed. I didn't know if I should wake her. I had really grown close to my mother. I decided to wake her.

I gave her a slight shake. She woke up as if she was scared. She opened her eyes and automatically saw me.

"Mom it's me."

"Renee, oh my goodness! I'm not dreaming, am I?"

"Mom, it's really me. Matthew came to get me."

She smiled real big and stod up. Her face was filled with pain. I mean, she looked happy right now, but I could tell she had barely done anything with her life while I was gone. She just looked like part of her was gone. She wrapped her arms around me and I hugged her back rubbing her back.

"Honey, I missed you so much."

"I missed you too." I said as she ruffled my hair. She wasn't crying, but she was about to. We sat down on the side of her bed and I decided to tell her absolutely everything about my dad's house. I told her about my scars and how Matthew basically saved me. She just kept smiling and playing with my hair.

That was when I had thought about it. Why did my mother even date my father? She was way too good for him. I decided to ask her even thouh it was hard to ask. I wondered if she would be comfortable telling the story. She acted perfectly normal about me asking the question. She took a big breath and then began to speak.

"Renee, I never wanted to marry your father. I did it because I didn't want for you to grow up in a household shere your parents were together."

"But why did you even have a relationship in the first place."

Mom laughed in a weird way. It was as if she was regretting everything which I am sure was the case.

"I was a stupid teenager. We all make mistakes, you know that. It was a night at a party and let's just say I took a few more drinks than I planned on drinking. My mind was wild. I was being a teen. Well, me and your father had a one night fling and the pregnancy test came out positive."

"So why did you get married?"

"Renee, I knew you're father was the man who got me pregnant. We decided that getting married was the best choice. We wanted to raise you together, but he ended up gettin so abusive. He would always call me terrible things and I didn't want you to see us fight so much."

It hurt me that mom only married my dad just to please me. I was the reason for her pain. I was the consequence for their one night 'fling'. I was a problem. But I knew that in the end, it would be okay. They weren't together and mom and I were happy with it just being us.

"So you married him because of me?"

"Yes darling, but it didn't work. But now with it being just you and me, I'm the happiest mom in the world. I have come to the point where all I need is you and god."

I gave mom another hug and just appriciated the moment with her. It was all perfect until she left me with a bit of suspense.

"Well Renee, since you're back... there's something I've been needing to tell you."

Authors note:

MY BIRTHDAY IS TOMORROW!!!!!! ILL BE 14 (JULY 31st)

Are you happy!? Or nah... Anyways, thanks for 84k! I'm glad I got time to update(:

So I haven't really asked a question in a while, but um what's your favorite tv show?(;

Mine is FINDING CARTER... OMG IT'S PERF.

~love Ry(:<3