• Levi •
I've wished for death too many times to count when I was a child. Too bad only my soul died, not my body.
Now that i'm older, I refuse to give up.I want answers.
Answers that my family can give me. A family that doesn't even know I exist...
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• Mayhem •
I expected her to be repulsed. Maybe laugh in my face and telling me I was a little bitch for not being able defend myself. Or asking me what was so bad about having sex at such a young age. I've seen how people can react towards rape victims. I clench my teeth together at the word victim. I fucking refuse to be a victim in any sense of the word.
Levi makes me look in my eyes by pulling my hair and asks me if I truly could've defended myself when I was older. I stay silent, remembering the hatred but fear I used to feel when that bitch would come into my room. No matter how much I worked out, no matter how strong my body got, my body would always refuse to move when she payed me her usual visits.
I fucking hated myself for that. Fucking hated the effect she had over me. But Levi looks at me like she understands. And that look sends a nauseating feeling to my stomach. "Your turn babe" I force out of my throat. I don't want to know just as much as I want to know. After seeing her face of pure understanding, I knew what was coming. It made me want to rip out some motherfuckers throat and crush some skulls. I push her head back onto my shoulder and hold her even tighter than before.
She doesn't seem to mind when she closes her eyes and grabs the back of my cut. She looks vulnerable, a look I never thought I would see on her.
"After my mother happily dumped me under a tree in front of the hospital where she gave birth to mea year before, I was put in a foster care home. I don't really remember anything of that time and when I turned 4 they placed me in an orphanage. I only lived there for a year when he came." I feel her swallow before continuing. "I never got to know his name. I was just told to call him Sir. He told me I wouldn't need my name anymore and that from now on I was his Doll.
"He was old and he wore an expensive looking suit, I remember being terrified of his bodyguards. The didn't seem have a soul, you could see it in their eyes, there was just nothing there but dark depths. The caretakers in the orphanage were also scared of Sir, they just gave me to him and I saw him giving them an envelope. Probably silence money.
"He sat me next to him in his luxurious car and eventually put me on his lap. Grazing his fingers over my legs. He scared me and I knew the life I had before was better than I thought it was at the time. I remember walking into his big mansion with dread. I remember the sound of the front door closing, closing me off from the outside world. I had a feeling my life ended the moment that door shut."
The more Levi talks, the colder her voices becomes. Her breathing slows down, quietly breathing in and out agains my throat. Her breaths soothing the anger that is starting to boil inside of me.
"He took me to a basement. There were doors on each side and I could hear small sobs coming from behind some of the doors. It only made me more terrified. He put me in one of the rooms and told me to be a good little Doll and that he would order someone to take me to him soon. The heavy door closing was the confirmation I needed to know that my life was basically over. I don't know how long it took for him to order me to come to his room. He told me how beautiful I was, how sinful. That he would fix me and make me his own little Doll. That he would ruin me so I could be his completely and that it was my fault.He would destroy my beauty and make me perfect.
