Beautiful No Longer

Chapter Three pt.2

"Im going out." I state blankly, staring at my mother from across the doorway.

She nods, not taking her gaze away from the window she's been looking out for the past weeks. 

I scoff as I pick up my sweater, Lana's actually, before slipping out the door into the darkening sky. I start walking down a dirt path that leads down to the creek in the woods. We used to go there with dad when we were younger, Lana and I. We would have picnics, go fishing, swimming. I miss those days. We were young, carefree.

I walk a little ways, taking in my surroundings. I stop at the creek when I spot a figure sitting on the rocks.

He turns around when he hears me behind him. He looks around my age, with dark hair and striking blue eyes.

"Umm.. Hello there." He says awkwardly.

"..H-Hello.." I stutter before turning to leave.

"Wait! Don't go!-" He says standing up.

""I just thought you might want to.. Y'know.. Be alone." I say looking up at him.

"No it's okay.. Actually I was hoping someone would come and find me before I do something I would probably regret..." He says, trailing off.

"What do you mean?" I say unsurely, as I walk over and sit next to him.

"Umm.." He says, shifting around.

"Wait, you didn't come here to, y'know..?" I ask, raising my eyebrows with a worried, knowing look.

"Well... You see.." He says hesitantly.

"It's alright. You can tell me." I say, hesitantly moving my hand over to squeeze his knee, reassuringly.

He smiles before starting.

"Well, I can't believe Im telling you this, considering you're a complete stranger," He grins even wider. "Is that crazy?"

"Kinda, but thats okay." I say with a giggle. What the hell? Since when do I giggle? I can at least tell when I stopped giggling..

"Are you sure? I don't wanna waste your time, if you have somewhere to be.. Or other things to do. Im pretty sure you'd much rather be doing something other than sitting and listening to a stranger tell you their pathetic story and how it led to a suicide that they were too cowardly to actually go through with." 

"Of course Im sure! It's not like I have anything else to do anyways.." I drift off.

"Okay... So basically it all started when my brother, James, was killed in a.. Car accident three years ago. I was broken. So was my dad. You see my brother was one of those straight A, star Quarterback,  perfect rolemodel brothers who everyone looks up too. Including myself. When he died, my father snapped. That's when he started drinking. He came home at nearly three in the morning everynight, stopped caring about everything, even me. Then he became angry. Having nothing else to take his anger out on, her turned to me. He would yell at me, saying "God took the wrong son,". He became very... abusive. He totally lost it. My mom left him soon after... Leaving me behind as well. Apparently she thought god took the wrong son too.. For the next year I was miserable, Until I found something, or better yet, someone. Her name was Shae. I grew so close to her, I loved her so much. Until one day, she didn't show up at school. I didn't think much of it at first, until she didn't come back the next day, or the next. I got worried, so I went to her house after school to see her. That day she told me something that would change our lives forever. She told me.. She had cancer. We tried to pretend for awhile, like nothing was there and nothing was wrong, until It got serious. It had spread to her lungs. She died before I could tell her how I felt. I came home from the hospital that day, crying. My dad saw me, and for a minute i thought I saw a glint of sympathy when I told him she had died, but that quickly vanished. He must've been reminded of James, because then he started to yell at me again. It only made me cry even more, which made him scream more. He told me something that day, that I will never forget. He told me to kill myself, because I wasn't needed anyway. I was just an extra weight on his shoulder, which was the last thing he needed. That night is also when I started cutting myself. I haven't stopped since." He says, tears rimming his eyes, threatening to fall.

I stare at him in shock, my own eyes tearing up as well. 

"I-Im so sorry.." I whisper before leaning in and hugging him tightly. I know I just met him, but I feel like I've known him longer.

"Don't be.. You have nothing to be sorry for.." He says into my shoulder.

I pull away and look him into the eyes.

"What's your name?" I ask, curious.

"Nathan. What about you?" He says.

"What about me?"

"Your name...?" He says with an isn't-it-obvious look.

*Mental-Facepalm* 

"Oh, Anna." I say blushing from embarassment.

"Well, Anna, can this be.. More than a one-time thing?" He says shyly.

"Of course!" I say smiling.

~

We talk until dark, agreeing to meet around the same time, tomorrow. When I get home, reality sinks in as I walk through the door, seeing my mother in the same spot, same position as earlier. 

"Where were you?" She asks, blankly.

"Out." I say, matching her tone.

We leave it at that when I go upstairs into my loft-like bedroom. 

I get ready for bed, then climb under the covers, Not crying myself to sleep for the first time in weeks.

~~

AUTHORS NOTE~

Hellooo! I decided to continue this story I changed it up a bit, hope you don't mind. But I suddenly had ideas and crap soooo yeah. Please vote or comment or whatever if you're reading this In the first place, I thank you.:) 

Lots of Love,

Sarakatee:)<3