Life As An Idol || Blackpink (Hybrid Version)

Hey...

I'm sorry for not posting as much as I used to. It's only been 2 days of school and I'm already stressed out. I also might be suffering from depression and social anxiety.. I often doubt myself, compare myself to others, and I just hate myself in general. I don't give myself credit and I don't believe myself. I just haven't been the best lately and it may get visible through my writing if I haven't brought it up. I'm not confident in anything I do. Sometimes I end up living off of your support for that day. It makes me see that I have some talent. I appreciate all of the support you've given me, even if I haven't been updating. But it quickly gets destroyed by the reality of our world. I'm emotionally challenged everyday. Having to speak to teachers and other students everyday..scares me. I'm a very shy and anti-social person so I don't talk much to strangers. If I do you can barely understand me because my voice is quiet. I'm aware that people go through this at least once in their life. I've never believed in myself. I don't give myself credit for things I create and do. Because of my struggles in lessons...I'm often hated and looked down on. It hurts me emotionally knowing that I'm being looked down almost all the time. My parents are trying to help me but I'm not sure if I'll ever get out of it. You probably don't care about my emotional health so I'll quit talking...

I'm sorry

~Ashlyn