After (the parody)

Chapter 1 - A New Friend

Chapter 1 - A New Friend

Tessa slowed the car down, looking in the rearview mirror to meet the eyes of Liam's adopted child sulu. Sulu stared back at her with fierce, Tara banks eyes. Those were Liam's eyes - oh wait. Sometimes Tessa forgot sulu was adopted. Even though she was very dark and blended in with the seat cover.

Stepping out of the car, Tessa slammed the door. She had arrived at the gas station. Leaving sulu in the car, she stepped inside the gas station to go buy some diet coke and tampons - or plugs as Harry called them. She also picked up a magazine for sulu to read - oh wait, sulu can't read. Stepping over to the cash register, she slapped $15 on the bench and gave the attendant a wink. The attendant winked back, she was nice, or maybe she just had Tourettes.

Tessa looks down to her watch to realise she's running late, sprinting back to the car, tampons and coke in her purse and magazine in hand she unlocks the car and jumps inside. Sulu is asleep on the floor in a peaceful slumber, and Tessa says "oh she'll be fine down there." She slams on the accelerator and hears the satisfying sound of sulu rolling on the floor. Tessa loved babysitting sulu because it made her feel like she had friends.

As soon as Tessa stepped into her apartment she knew something was wrong, the door had been open and there were chains and whips on the floor and empty bottles of lubricant decorated the walls. This wasn't right. She stepped back, placing sulu on the floor. Then she looked at the door number, this was apartment 24 not 25. This was Christian Grey's apartment! No wonder it smelt of oil and stolen innocence in here!

Smiling to herself, she walked out of the apartment and shut the door behind her only then did she realise that she had left sulu inside.

Oh well! Christian would return her, even if her virginity was no longer intact.

Smiling to herself and humming, she stepped inside the elevator and pressed the button.