Jess is constantly telling me to drop the endless stream of astrophysics parallels I tend to draw to basically everything in life. She says it shows my not- so- inner- geek off, but Jess wasn't here now, so I mentally started drawing one...
About 50, 000 light years away, on the far side of the Milky Way galaxy in the constellation of Sagittarius lies, SGR 1806-20. It's a massive magnetar, which is a type of star that generates an unimaginably strong magnetic field. These fields are so strong, that they are hundreds of millions of times stronger than any man-made magnet. Well, right now, there was a bright pink Magnetar sitting three rows down and I couldn't help being drawn to it. Crazy as it sounds, even with my back to her I could almost feel her pulling at me. After resisting the urge for as long as I possibly could, I finally decided to look back at her and attempt a normal conversation.
But when I did. Something was very wrong. She looked completely green, and I'm not using this as an expression of speech, she really looked green! Not a particularly good look considering the pink of her pajamas. Her eyes were wide with shock, and she was looking around the plane as if she was on a bad acid trip and could see the Matrix. She was trembling slightly and I could make out the beads of sweat forming on her forehead.
Suddenly she looked down at her slippers, as if she was seeing them for the first time, which she wasn't of course- and a strange look washed over her face. It was almost as if she was communicating with them (maybe she was on acid?) And then her shoulders started to heave as if she was going to---
Oh God. She did.
The reaction around her was instantaneous, and it caught on like a domino effect. People recoiled. Some flashed her disapproving looks whilst others looked away, pretending that they hadn't seen. This is just one of the many things I don't get about people these days. About society, and it's one of the many reasons I choose not to be apart of it in so many ways.
If a person tripped and fell in public, how many people would rush over to help them? No one. No one ever does. People always choose to turn a blind eye- maybe it's because everyone is always so wrapped up in their own shit- I don't know.
Well, I wasn't. Especially not when it came to her.
"Hey, are you okay," I moved over to her. She looked up and me and I could see she was definitely a little less green. For a moment she looked surprised, I wasn't sure if she was suspired that someone was helping her, or that I was helping her.
She gave me a slight nod and a tiny smile- it had that same stupid effect on me as before."Thanks, I feel a bit better now." Her voice was soft, not like before and for some inexplicable reason, I wanted to reach out and put my hand on her shoulder. But I didn't.
"Can I get you a Coke, they're good for nausea?" I didn't wait for her reply, though, and quickly walked up the aisle. The stewardess was only too happy that someone else was handling the situation and rolled her eyes at me knowingly, as if she thought I was doing the strange creature some kind of a massive favor. I took the Coke back to her, opened the can and passed it over.
"It's Lilly, right?" I asked. The last thing I wanted to do was call her by the wrong name and I hadn't been conserntrating that well during our last interaction.
She nodded slightly. "Thanks, Damien." It was the first time I'd heard her say my name and there was something so striking about it. It sounded familiar and natural, as if she was meant to say my name.
"Yes. Damien."
Lilly looked grateful for the Coke and smiled, which made me really happy for some reason. I crouched down in the aisle next to her and waited and watched while she drank. I could see that with each sip she was starting to look more normal... well, as normal as she could look under the circumstances. The close proximity gave me the opportunity to really look at her. I was studing her features, trying to imagine what she looked like under all that smudgy make-up and 80's looking hair, when she said something that caught me off guard.
"Hey, what's that for?" she pointed at something on my arm. I followed her finger and found myself looking at the small, heart tatoo on my wrist. The tattoo I'd gotten after my little sister had died.
"It's for my sister. She died." I said flatly and quickly. There was no hint of emotioin in my voice, it was just cold, neutral. It was a purposeful, over the years I'd trained myself to say it like this, not because I didn't feel it, just the oposite actualy. Because I felt it too much. Sometimes you have to distance yourself form the words, for the sake of protection. People are also less likely to make you take about it, when you use that tone.
Suddenly Lillly looked very uncomfortable and I wanted to try and explain to her why I'd said it like that. That I wasn't some kind of a weird, cold hearted bastard that felt nothing. We descended into an uncomfortable silence and an awkward tension built, so I got up and walked away.
*Waiting for the Night- Depeche Mode (Beautiful, so beautiful and funny too when Martin (blonde dude) messes up the lyrics a bit.)
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Burning Moon (Wattpad Version)
Literatura Feminina(#1 ChickLit) WARNING: Being left at the altar in front of 500 wedding guests may lead to irrational behavior, causing you to go on your honeymoon alone. Other side- effects may include very bad hair, getting arrested, setting yourself on fire, land...
