Irrelevance

Nostalgia

I'm in a stadium of people but I sit alone.

They're all jumping and screaming in celebration but I'm crying because every time I relive the memory, it's always heavily clouded by the bitter reminder of what comes next. All the people in the stadium would fall asleep that very night and it will be a peaceful sleep filled with lucid dreams that would elude them into thinking that their life carries on...

But they don't, and they never do, wake up.

I do though.

But what's the point when everyone's gone and forgotten you. I tried to sleep so many times but all I ever do is close my eyes to the dark abyss and it's even colder and lonelier there than it is here.

I know they're others like me that got left behind but everyone is too submerged in their own kind of darkness to seek out a silver lining together.

So I'm alone in the stadium, clouding myself in the nostalgia, where I'll remain forever until someone finds me or at least remembers me.

But then what?

I can't leave this wretched place and I can't live here either so what do I do?

What happens next?

I don't want to dwell on it so I walk back home from the stadium and for a second, it's almost as if they were back but when I call to them, they don't acknowledge me and they replay as another memory. They're all so happy, mostly about winning the game and there's a feast on the table that smells delicious and there's laughter and teasing and the sounds of life.

But it's all a memory and I cry as I watch them all say goodnight carelessly as if it weren't the last. Then it's all swallowed up by the silence and the house is empty as I break down into a pathetic mess of tears .

and I cry

and cry

cry

until I cry myself to sleep...