A New Beginning

Chapter One: Going Home

It's been 1 year to the date since Wall Maria was taken back. Since then, we've fought and grown in order to sustain a new world. One without being scared for our lives, or worrying when the next attack would be. I never thought the day would come, and we were able to go home. Well what was left of home. The Shiganshina District had to be rebuilt, and is still a work in progress; but today was the day I would return.

What a strange feeling to return to the place where everything was lost. My life changed here, and I don't know if it was for the better. I went to the exit of the train and heard children laughing and playing. They looked happy, without a care in the world. I got caught up in watching them, that I forgot I was blocking the exit.

"Sorry", I muttered as I rushed off the train, allowing others to exit.

I'm sure I looked like a tourist. My eyes were wide as I scanned what was around me. Many new shops filled the town, people genuinely seemed happy. It was a Saturday, so the town was filled with families enjoying their weekend. Weekend. I wonder what it's like to enjoy time off. I guess I'm going to find out.

I walk down the streets, looking down at the note that had my new apartment address. I walk into my apartment building. It looks like I'm on the 8th floor. Well at least I know I'll be getting exercise. I walk up the 8 flights of stairs with ease, being in the Scout Regiment has kept me fit. Looks like I'll have to find a new way to exercise. I walk up to the door that says 803, and open the door.

It was one of the newest apartment buildings in this district, so it was updated; but nothing special. I had a one bedroom apartment, plenty of space for myself. I went to the window in my room, and saw I had a view of my town. I could see families laughing together, couples holding hands--I immediately look away. Reminded of the pain in my chest. I walk away from the window and sit on the floor where a bed should be. I lay on my back and put one arm over my face. Trying to block out what I just saw.

I was awoken to a knock at the door. I was confused, not realizing where I was or when I fell asleep. My eyes snap open.

"Maybe it's him", I whisper as I run to the door.

I open it with hope, only to be crushed to see it wasn't him.

"Are you Mikasa Ackerman?" The delivery man asked.

"Yes", I sighed.

The man had me sign some papers. The Scout Regiment had sent me a few essentials for my apartment. The delivery man moved in my bed, couch, and a dresser.

"Thank you." I said as he walked out the door.

The delivery man turned around and said, "Oh, I almost forgot."

He reached into his pocket, and pulled out a letter with my name on it. He handed it to me, and left. My heart started to race when I saw the handwriting. It was him. I ran to my couch, and plopped down. I started to open the letter, my hands shook.

Mikasa,

I hope you are settling into your new apartment, and that it is to your liking. I'm sad to know that we won't be living together; or even in the same district for the matter. I think this will be good for us, we can grown into our own selves. You won't have to worry about taking care of me anymore, I know that must've been a burden. I'm so sorry that was put on you. But seriously, don't worry about me. Live your own life. You're a free person, as am I. That has to feel good right? Anyway, I hope to see you soon. I'm looking to come to your district in 2 weeks, but we'll see. Historia has me very busy. Enjoy your first weeks as a free person.

Eren

I didn't realize it, but tears were streaming down my face. Why would he think looking after him was a burden? My heart hurt. I pulled up the red scarf that was always around my neck. I sniffed, and there were only lingering traces of him. He was fading away from me. The thought brought more tears to my eyes. I never wanted to be separated from him. He was never a burden to me. Why couldn't he see that? My face grew red with anger when I remembered a part of his letter.

Historia has me very busy.

What the hell was that supposed to mean? I laid on my couch and looked at the ceiling, thinking back to the past few weeks. So much has happened. Some of the members of the Scout Regiment were ordered to retire, even though many of them were young and didn't want to. Erwin said we had done more than what we were asked, and that we should enjoy the rest of our boring lives. Eren and I were one of those people. At first I was excited, a normal life with Eren. That is until he told me he was working at Historia's side. She was the Queen now, so she needed advisors; but why him.

As for me, I will most likely be getting a normal job within the walls. I think I would lose my mind if I had nothing to do.

I looked out my window, and saw that the sun had set. The stars were bright. I decided that fresh air may help my mood. I grabbed a jacket, and fixed my scarf. Walking outside, I felt the crisp autumn air on my face. I started to walk with no destination. My legs moved as I thought about Eren's letter. How could he leave me on my own like that? We have been inseparable since we were kids. Why did he make this decision for me? I would've went with him, and worked for the Queen. I looked up and saw that I was at the wall.

I sighed. Even subconsciously I'm drawn to where he was. I looked up to the stars, and found an ounce of comfort in the thought that Eren and I shared the same sky. I put my forehead on the wall.

I close my eyes and whisper, "Eren."

I'm not sure how long I was there or if anyone had seen me, but I decided to go home.

I was close to my apartment when I saw a bar that was still well alive even though it was late. There were people laughing. Everyone looked so happy. I decided that if I had to get a job, maybe this would be a good one.

I walk in and go up to the counter.

I ask the man behind the counter, "Are you looking for extra help? I'm in need of work."

The man smiled and said, "Sure. How old are you, kid?"

"21", I replied.

"Great", He said, "The name is Gil. I'm the owner here. Do you think you could start sometime next week? I can show you how we do things around here."

I replied, "Next week it is."

Gil and I talk for a few more minutes. He asked me a few more questions, and then we said our goodbyes. I walked out, and felt hopeful. Maybe this is what I need. This will keep my mind occupied. What would Eren think? Would he be proud?

I shook those thoughts out of my head. I'm on my own, I need to stop relying on him so much. Clearly he doesn't need me. I lock my door behind me and head to my room. I changed into a t-shirt and shorts, keeping the scarf on; and laid down on my bed. For a few minutes I just laid on the bed with my eyes shut, clutching the scarf.

What am I going to do without him?

Angry tears ran down my cheeks. Why would he choose to be without me? Do I mean nothing to him? I ripped the scarf off and threw it across the room. A terrifying thought entered my mind.

What if Eren is in love with her?

I laid down on my back and covered my mouth. I was attempting to choke back the sobs. Even the mere thought was enough to send me spiraling.

I did everything for him. Defended him, protected him, loved him. Why wasn't that enough?