Be a Saint or Be a Sinner (ON HOLD! UNDER REVISION)

6 🔱

YNA's POV

I wasn't the cause of his unrestrained anger, merely his relief valve. There's so much jealousy in him, hatred in his eyes then so much remorse afterwards. Any wasn't my fault.

Buong buhay ko pinangarap kong maging normal,  magkaroon ng kompleto at masayang pamilya, mabuhay na parang normal na bata, any dream that any child would want. Nothing was indeed perfect, sapat na ang kompleto kayo at masaya kayo pareho. Kung magkaroon  man ng problema, tulong tulong o susuportahan ang isa't isa para maresolba ito. 

Pero lahat ng 'yun pinagkait sa akin, lahat 'di ko nakamtan.

  I always have to remind myself that that's just a fantasy.

After my parent's death, I've lived in a void so black that no light can penetrate. Madalas mapagalitan, and worse madalas mabugbog. It then created a wound that can never heal no matter how much aid is poured on.   

"The food doesn't have feet Yna." Ibinaba ni Jaco ang hawak na dyaryo at saka ako tinignan. His lips turned into an evil smirk with a hint of malice in it. "O baka gusto mong subuan kita?" 

Then this guy came. I don't know how to act in front of him. Or kung paano siya pasalamatan. Or should I even thank him in the first place? Troubling himself to save me is suspicious, I couldn't help not to doubt.  Yet, most part of me wanted to reconsider it.

"Don't bother yourself in thinking why I saved you, of course may kapalit 'yun." 

Nanlaki ang mga mata ko nang makita ko siya sa harapan ko, his face was just a few inch away from me. He was so close that I could already smell his minty breath. I can't think straight. My breathing were rapid and shallow. I can feel my pulse pounding in my temples.I tried averting my gaze but he took my chin and forced me to look at him.

"Kiss me Yna, maybe I'll consider calling it quits."

I breathe deep. In. Out. He looks at me, his eyes glistening, fire were absolutely visible in it. He took a few strands of my hair then tucked it in behind my ear.

His thumb caressed my cheek. Inilayo ko ng bahagya ang mukha ko dahil medyo kumirot ito. There was a small wound in it na kahit nagamot ay kumikirot parin. If I remembered it clearly, isa sa tauhan nung demonyo ang may gawa nito. Sinindihan niya ang candila at pinainit ang dulo ng kutsilyo rito saka idikit sa pisngi ko.

Once again, I am drawn in the bad memories of what happened days ago. The horror of what I've been through. I recall how my body jarred with each blow, how the pain seared through my skin and took away every feeling of safety I ever had.

How I wish I could just put all the bad memories of the past and put it in a box, then forget it. Or better yet bury them deep underground.

"I killed those worthless humans and the only payback I will get is this? Just you staring at me, your mind in elsewhere, thinking of another man? Who is it and I'm blow his head off? Up and down if you may."

"H-huh?"

I hesitantly looked up at him. The swirls of emotion I saw there made me gasp. Lust and desire.

The next thing I knew, he had slammed his lips to mine and nearly knocked all wind from my lungs. I hardly had a moment to react before he pressed his tongue to the seam of my lips.

My body went rigid with surprise as trembles shook me . I was completely unprepared.

Gusto ko siyang itulak papalayo, my mind says I should yet my body contradicts it. My hands wouldn't move as if it was paralyzed.