"Fix Me"

Penny For You Thoughts?

Chapter 20.

Exactly 5 days until Christmas, I haven't had a relapse since I've been home and I'm honestly praying I don't. Given the circumstances of my situation it's inevitable though, at least that what all the nurses said to me. I took the liberty of calling Dr. Hamish over for a therapy session. I know it's suppose to be family bonding time but I have a few things to get off my chest.

This morning I woke up to Presely's arm wrapped tightly around my waist so tight actually I had to wake him up in order to get out of his steel grip. I think I'm falling in love. It's soon, it's scary, and it's exciting actually lo-.. caring for someone this way. There is still so much I need to know about him, so much he hasn't told me. But I feel so connected to him , it's strange and confusing this feeing . The door bell the rang meaning Dr. Hamish was here. I smoothed down my hair before walking over to the front door and opening it. Immediately I was wrapped in a warm hug.

"It's so good seeing you outside of that hospital Ella! look at you , your skin is so full of color and your eyes look happier. You look so alive, how have you been? Oh my gosh you - wait I'm sorry I'm babbling."

I smiled "It's ok come in, we'll probably be speaking in the back yard. Everyone is home and I don't want to take the chance of them hearing our conversation." She nodded with understanding and followed me to the backyard. I slid the door open and walked over to a set of chairs under the shade, nearest to the pool.

"So what's happening? in life, in your mind, what have you been thinking ?" she asked me.

I sighed, "this is not so much a family issue more along the lines of my love life .."

"Go on."

"Dr. Hamsih the past month or so I've seen a side of Presley that I didn't know existed and my feelings for him just get stronger and stronger. I'm afraid to like let alone love him because look at me.. I'm not good enough for him physically , and he can't handle me emotionally or mentally. I'm afraid that if I allow my self to fall for him I'll only hurt him in the end, Plus I barely even know him! Well of course I know him but I want to know all the things he hasn't told anyone, I want him to trust me enough to share what's on his mind when he drifts off sometimes and just stares at nothing thinking, you know ?"

"Hm, this is tricky. But think about it this way Ella, Presley has temporarily put his life on hold in order to make sure you are ok and well taken care of at all times. He slept right there in that hospital with you, he comforted you, encouraged you, supported you and he continues too plus much more . You are both young and have a long journey ahead but you two also have a connection. One that I haven't seen in a while, you have a lot to learn about each other. Ella you never know, you could be the missing piece to the puzzle he has been searching for all his life, and he to you."

But could it be that simple ?, does Presley have some other reason he's doing all this for me?.. In the beginning He tried non stop to get me to sleep with him, could that be the reason he's been so caring? All for sex, am I just a game to h-

"Stop."

"Stop what?"

Doctor Hamish gave me the 'do I really have to say it face' . I sighed,

"Got it. Stop over thinking, I get it."

For the next hour or so I talked to her about anything and everything. She even let me know a few more things about her like she once had a daughter. Sophia was her name, her boyfriend at the time though was a druggy, I remember the story she told me about how he use to abuse her . She never mentioned Sophia before . Doctor Hamish told me that her eyes were the lightest shade of brown , her hair almost pitch black, and she had a smile that was contagious . She spoke fondly of the little girl and my heart began to ache as she got into the part when Sophia was taken away ,