"When people don't know exactly what depression is, they can be judgmental." - Marion Cotillard
The walls would mock you.Still blazed and ungrounded. Plainly grey with no Images. The clear window that was shatterproof whilst also being impossible to open. Between your chest, you could feel the pain of your beating heart. Slowly beating - sharp excruciating pain would drip through you in ecstasy.
The anxiety laying in your guts, giving you the unintentional yet familiar feelings of nausea would flood your senses once more.
The most painful feeling of all was the emptiness of your stomach. How the acids have been bubbling and breaking down absolutely nothing as you had no food intake for the past 3 days.
You refused to eat.
The fear of gaining the unlosable weight had you shaken.
Tilting your head to the side, you were attempting to avoid the darkness of the room. Fearing that maybe you would wake up the demons in your head that would usually keep you up at night.
Isn't this humorous though?
How now you refused to sleep - just to make sure the war zone in your mind would calm down and give you rest. Your arms were entangled in the white restraints that would hold you still
You feared that if you had to move yet another inch. The alarms will go off to signal to escape.
The anxiety attack will start.
Insomnia would leave you for days on end with no sleep. Momentarily waking up in hopes of not wanting to open your eyes.
You hated the do-overs.
How the sun would rise so brightly just to burn us - to blind us with its sickening yellow. The color that symbolizes the joyful happiness of life.
You don't have that joyful happiness.
Your stomach growls yet again, you tilt your head in the other direction where your food was laid on the black plastic round table.
YOU ARE READING
Lighthouse ✓
Fanfiction"When you feel lost that's when I'll reach out - to guide you home with my lighthouse." Asylum AU