You Can't Live Like This... (The Rules of Survival Fanfiction)

Cumberland Farms

My story starts at Cumberland Farms. The first time I met Matthew. After learning he had you two as his sisters, I would probably have assumed that Callie stayed at home with you, Emmy. So what I decided to do was try and make some new friends since I didn't have any for the four years I'd been living in Southie with Murdoch. I approached the boy (who I later learned was your brother) with confidence and determination... Not the best for someone like me.

"Hi there!" I say quite cheerfully. Now, Emmy, don't let Matthew know I told you about this either, but he literally jumped out of his skin I surprised him so much. When he jumped he dropped one of the things from the freezers he held. I jumped a bit too at his reaction, picking up the thing he dropped. "Sorry. I'm kinda loud, huh? Anyways," I held out the can to him, smiling sweetly. "My name's Lynnette! It's nice to meet you!... In my own unique way," I remember feeling my face go hot, and my arm instantly rose up, hand rubbing the back of my neck. In one swift motion, Matthew took the can and out it back, managing his own greeting. "Hello. It's nice to meet you too."
"So," I wrapped my arm around his neck loosely and friendly. "What's your name, stranger?" His brow actually quirked at my overly chillness. He answered a bit dully. "Uh... Matthew?"
"Ooo! Cool!" I giggled and let go of him. Surprisingly, even though we're (I found this out) exactly one year apart, he always had the height advantage over me. I looked up at him from my small stature. "So, what're you doing here, Matthew? Just hanging out?"
"Um... Yeah?"
"Mind if I join you?"
"Uh... I guess not."

Emmy, I won't lie to you; Matthew seemed really distant. My eleven-year-old mind immediately thought that he was just an awkward kid who didn't really have friends. When I learned why, I honestly hated my eleven-year-old self for thinking so simply. Anyways, Matthew and I actually walked around the entire store before we were kicked out for loitering. We still joke about who's fault it really was (I'll admit, it was mainly my fault, I was dancing around and spinning, not exactly being discreet about loitering). As we walked down the practically empty street, we joked and laughed and smiled at each other.

"So... Lynnette, was it?"
"You can call me Lynny if Lynnette is too hard to remember."
"Oh... Well, Lynny-"
"Mhm?" Emmy, I was very excited, so you can't blame me for being so happy and quick to answer to the boy I just met a few half hours ago. I remember apologizing a lot that night. "Sorry. Continue?"
"Uh... well... um..." He stalled.

I could smell his awkwardness from a mile away, no matter how stupid my eleven-year-old brain was. The reason I knew, was because I was the same way. Back in Orange County. I was so awkward that I couldn't even look a kid the same age as me in the eye without almost having an anxiety attack and hyperventilating. I'll get into that reason later. For now, let's continue talking about your cringy brother from five years ago. "How about this," I stopped him, grabbing him by the shoulders and staring him directly in the eye. I'm not gonna lie, my anxiety rose a bit, but I wasn't exactly in a ball on the ground from doing that. I continued with, "Let's do a bit of a twenty questions kind of thing, yeah? You ask me a question, I ask you one, okay?" For some reason or another, his cheeks burned rosy red, and he nodded. I could see the cold sweat dripping down him, unless that was just the humidity and cold mixing together.

"Okay.." He muttered, and I gave him another warm and friendly smile.
"So, I'll ask first, just to get things up and running," I tapped a finger to my chin. "How old are you? You look like a teenager. Are you somethin' like, 14?" And he shook his head.
"12."
"Really? Wow!" I wave my head to him. "Your turn."
He pondered for a moment before answering. "Who do you live with?"

And now it was my moment of silence. I was trying to think of the best way to say it. "I... live with my older brother... who's also kind of like my dad. My actual dad is also his dad, but... well, he wasn't exactly the greatest." I shrugged, stuffing my hands in my pockets. I didn't need to look to know Matthew was still staring, waiting for me to continue. I kept explaining. "From what my mom told me... she hooked up with this guy for a night... and that man happened to be my brother's dad. She died of pneumonia a couple years ago... so I'd been living with my dad since... until I ran away." I felt the tension. And this feeling, Emmy, I didn't know what it was at first, but now I know. It was a sense of relief. Probably knowing a kid like me escaped my crazy father being only seven years old, it may have given him hope... but maybe it just made him sad, and I'm completely wrong. He spoke up after a block or so.
"Sorry for asking... I didn't know it'd be a touchy subject--"
"No no no, it's okay!" I said quick, trying to assure him it didn't bother me. Nowadays it doesn't, but when I was eleven, it did kinda sting to remember it. But of course, because I was a very caring person, I put Matthew before me. "Really truly, I don't mind talking about it." I gave him another warm smile.

His eyes seemed to wander from my eyes to behind me. I turn around, and we in front of an old looking apartment building. I had assumed by the way he was looking at it, it was his home, the apartment building you and Bobbie tried very hard to run away from, Emmy. That building. "Hey, what's up? That your house?" And with a simple twinkle from the utter guilt in his eye, he came out and said, "Nope. Let's keep walking."

We continued to ask each other questions. Soon, I felt as if I knew who he was, and vice versa. He told me about Callie, and how much of a nerd she was (she still is nerdy, but it's not a bad thing), he told me about his dad, Ben, and how he's "not really in the picture anymore, but still a good guy." He even told me about you, Emmy. Even though you were only three, he still talked about your small, quiet little self. It was around 9:30 and night when Murdoch actually came to get me. Emmy, he never actually saw Matthew, and Matthew to Murdoch. Murdoch only asked me when he picked me up on that stale summer night, "Who were you walking with?"
"Oh... just a boy I met at the store."
"Ooh, Lynny dear, I think you might want to be careful. You might fall in love with him~"
"S-Shuddup! I-It's been a day, Murdoch! You expecting me to start kissing him?" I could feel the heat radiating from my reddened cheeks. I crossed my arms and pouted, just staring out the window. He sighed a chuckle before ruffling my hair.
"C'mon, kid, you know I'm kidding. But hey, you never know. Just keep talking with your friend. I'm just glad you have someone to call your friend besides me." He kept his eyes on the road, but he put a hand on my arm and squeezed it gently. I stop pouting and look over at him. "Where'd that warm smile go?" That made me giggle, and he smiled a smile that-and I never noticed this until I thought back while writing this-didn't quite reach his eyes.

I thought it was going to be a blessing when he found Nikki... turns out it had just made things worse.