You Can't Live Like This... (The Rules of Survival Fanfiction)

A True Family... Almost

At ten o'clock at night, I heard a knock on our door. I figured it was just Julie Lindemann, Murdoch's neighbor. But as I opened the door, I was face to face with you guys and Nikki. Matthew and Callie both looked anxious, and you, Emmy, tired as well as excited. "Lynn who is it?" Murdoch called, then coming to the door. He saw Nikki's face a quirked a brow. "Um... hi, Nikki."
"Hey, so I have to leave for a couple hours. Rebekah's in the hospital and she needs someone to take care of her and sign her out when she's better, so would you mind watching the kids for me? Don't want them by themselves overnight." She held you out, Emmy, and almost as automatic as a robot, Murdoch took you in his arms before Nikki ran off to her car, leaving you, Matthew, and Callie on our doorstep. Murdoch took one look and your siblings before saying, "Come on in. It's probably cold out there."

I knew Nikki better than Murdoch. Matthew told me about her random nights where she'd be gone for a couple hours to a couple days, even almost entire weeks, and he said that she always left you guys home. As Callie and Matthew stepped inside, I closed the door, and just from your brother's posture, I could tell he felt you three weren't welcomed. "You three must be tired. You can take-"
"My room." I but in, looking at Murdoch. "The girls can take my room. I'll sleep on the couch. Matthew can sleep in my room too, if he wants." Murdoch looked down at your sleepy face, nodding. "Alright. Lemme show you girls where Lynn's room is." As you and Callie walked with Murdoch down the hallway, I looked over at Matthew, standing still and staring guiltily at the floor. His back was turned to me.

I hugged him from behind, my cheek pressing to his shoulder. "I said you'll always be welcomed, Matt..."
"Not like this," he said, "not this way."
"Matthew, look at me..." as I said this, he turned to face me. I saw the tiredness in his eyes. "... lay down on the sofa, okay?"
"Lynny-"
"I have an air mattress in my room. I can sleep in there... unless you want me out here."

His eyes, though guilt endured and glazed over with tiredness, I saw that he was begging me to be near him. To keep comforting him. I smile sadly. "It's okay that you're here, Matthew... he's not gonna throw you out or take you home..." Emmy, I don't think you've seen this before, and you might not believe me when I say this, but your brother cried. He started shaking and he cried. I was his only comfort left. He said so himself.

We sat on the sofa and just hugged as he got the tears out of his system. Murdoch came out with a nod. "The girls are asleep. Emmy wanted me to read a bedtime story after she woke up." At this point, Matthew was asleep, head on my shoulder, all tuckered out. I looked over at Murdoch and smiled. "That's good..."
"And... you've got Matthew. Want me to blow up the air mattress outside?"
"... nah. I'll sleep in the armchair. I like sleeping on it anyways."
"If you say so.... I'm off to bed. Night, pumpkin," he kisses the top of my head before going to his room. "Don't stay up too late." I rolled my eyes at him and nodded. "I won't."

As soon as Murdoch was out of sight, I gently laid Matthew down, making sure not to wake him up before going to the linen closet and grabbing some cozy covers and a fluffy pillow. I brought them back to the sofa, putting the pillow under your brother's head as carefully as possible. After that, I covered him with the comforter I used to have on my bed, making sure to try to tuck it in around him so it wouldn't leave parts of him hanging out. As I looked at Matt's sleeping face, I smiled and-I'll admit, Emmy, I'm glad he was asleep- I kissed his forehead, going to grab my own blankets and pillow before lay-sitting in the armchair, covering myself up and resting my head on my pillow. "... night, Matthew." I mumble before closing my eyes. As I drifted into slumber, I heard a groggy but sleep filled voice say, "Night, Lynn..."

The next morning, because it was Columbus Day (or Indigenous People's Day in our present era), we all had a free day to do whatever the hell we wanted. I saw you were the most excited, Em. You were so happy when Murdoch took us to the beach, hiking, and out to a little place by the causeway where they were selling little trinkets and knickknacks. Basically a huge yard sale by the ocean. I bought each of you a ring (You got two because Murdoch gave you his). I got myself a red gem, Matthew a teal gem, Callie a purple gem, you a pink gem, and Murdoch an orange gem. I smiled as Murdoch, with the smile he's had since I moved in four years ago, picked you up and put you in the truck. Once I had gotten in, I noticed how you were getting tired back there, and soon fell asleep on Callie, who was also asleep. Matthew was the only one out of you three that was awake. We listened to some soft aesthetic beats from my playlist. I turned my head to face Matthew, smiling a bit. "Comfortable?"
His head sort of lulled up, as if he were actually tired, but couldn't get himself to sleep. He cleared his throat, nodding. "Y-yeah."
"You sure?"
"Yeah... positive."
"Okay..." I turned back around, and the rest of that night was silent.

As midnight approached, I sat awake in the armchair at Murdoch's, you girls and him already asleep. Matthew-who I thought was asleep-jumped me when his tired, groggy voice grumbled, "If you're not gonna turn off your light, then I'll actually go sleep with Callie and Emmy in your room."
I bit my lip, reaching to turn off the light. "S-sorry-"
"What's wrong?" He sat up from the couch, rubbing his eyes. He grabbed the blanket and stood up, siting on the arm of the chair. I blinked at him, looking away. "N-nothing..."
"Come on. You've comforted me when something's wrong, it's unfair that you're going to keep it from me."

I sighed softly, just leaning my head back. "I can't sleep... been having nightmares." I lied. In truth, I was a major insomniac. Sometimes I'd just stay awake all night. This was one of those nights. Matthew just listened as I made up this huge lie about some elaborate nightmare I had that I didn't even really have. As Matthew listened, he'd every once in a while nod. The minute I said I was done talking, and that I had finished telling him the dream, he rubbed my shoulder. "That sounds terrible..."
"Yeah... kinda scared to fall back asleep."

He sort of shrunk a bit before grabbing my arm and pulling me over to the couch. "M-Matt?" Again, your brother had the mind and movement of an adult, he sat down on the couch and pulled me with him, laying down in the sort of spooning position. He was silent the entire time. I was the flustered mess as I lay with my back facing him, feeling him hug me. "Sorry... you just looked like you needed it." Emmy, I'll be honest; that was the quickest I had ever fallen asleep. Again, don't care what you think about it, I'm going to tell you.

Matthew was very warm, and surprisingly comfortable. His arms held me tight to him, his face actually in the crook of my neck. He almost made it look like we were a couple. As soon as I heard the soft breaths of a sleeping boy, I fell right to sleep.

Didn't know that would've been the last night I'd feel that warmth in our young teenage years.