What are the Odds (A.I)

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The world we live in today can be terrifying to say the least, we are constantly surrounded by tragedy. There are 1.5 million homeless, 43 million live below the poverty line, 7.6 million animals euthanized each year, and over 33,000 people are shot and killed each year, and this only includes the North American stats. All that misfortune only accounts for seven percent of the population of the entire country. But you never anticipate being a part of that seven percent. Parents can't even feel safe sending their children to school without having bullet proof pads for the kids to hide under hanging in every pre-k to 12th grade class.

Especially on a night you have been looking forward to for nearly a year, from the second you purchase a concert ticket it is always sitting in your subconscious waiting to be let out. Unfortunately for me I don't get the chance to let it out, I am content in my solitude though it often leads to loneliness.

Loneliness doesn't come often when you've lived like me this long. I'm going along with my every day routine. Gym, shower, work, sleep, repeat. Walking a quick pace on the treadmill until I reach five miles without having an asthma attack, most days takes an hour and a half, an hour and a half of ear ringing music blasting and catching up on the news via captions. The captions being the highlight of my gym experience since it basically guarantees there will be no strangers attempting to make small talk. Six people shot at a gaming tournament in Florida a couple days ago, sad but not surprising.

I can't say that I'm the thinnest person I know, which is a part of the reason I've become a gym rat but I make up for it by not being the shortest. My bright blue hair, every piece of clothing I own being black and a few piercings down both my ears make up my entire aesthetic which can be a huge asset when you need to bulldoze your way through crowds at concerts every couple weeks. I am one of those lucky few who got a ticket to see five seconds of summer for tonight, since I'm one of the only people left on earth that actually actively listens to the radio I managed to win my way into the pit. I'm not saying that the absolutely tiny general admission section of their concerts counts as a 'pit' but it is the only section where you can get close enough to see their faces without looking at a jumbo screen. 

Early admit begins at five o'clock but the actual concert doesn't begin until eight tonight. Which is why I am at my gym at 8am, I am one of the crazies that stocks up a cheap string backpack and camps out for the best view hours before being allowed in. It gives me a chance to make a friend that I won't have to worry about losing in the crowd, who may also have the same insane tendencies I have of wasting my day away sitting in line. The best part of this venue is that no one is allowed on the property until the sun is up, so there was no problem about what I do to camp out this time.

Showering at the gym becomes a lot less disgusting as you get used to it, in the long run at the very least I'm getting clean every day. I did manage to learn the hard way to never, ever take a shower in a public area without cheap old navy flip flops on. I still get itchy thinking about it. Walking out of the Planet Fitness I avoid making eye contact as I wave to the fitness trainers.

After shoving my gym clothes into my dirty laundry bag I spray it with the remainder of the bottle of febreeze I have left. As always I try to start my car but the third time's the charm as it sputters alive. I hear a dinging immediately along with the light of a little gasoline symbol.

"Yes I know you're thirsty just make it one more day I promise" because you need to talk to something or you'll go insane. I talk to my car, my phone and myself and it makes for good company simply because nothing talks back.

Allentown is a fairly busy city, way overpopulated but one that I'm very familiar with all the same. The fairgrounds is basically the only level area in the city, only a small outdoor concert venue and some pavement occupy the land until its festival season. Which means that every building around it is basically a high riser. There are a few skyscrapers about a block away and a very small wing of a hospital across the street but otherwise it's all a housing district.