Not Jealous: A Troyler Story

Chapter 1

Troye's P.O.V.

The setting sun shone brazenly over Tyler and Korey's new house and the party of the Summer was well under way. Vidcon 2015 had just ended and everyone was invited to Tyler and Korey's housewarming barbecue. Of course they had moved into their bachelor pad a few months ago but what better time to throw a party then when every youtuber was in L.A.?

Music was playing in the background but it was drowned out by the loud buzz of laughter and chatter. Mamrie was helping loosen everyone up after the long weekend by mixing up some of her favorite drinks; they also happened to be some of her strongest. As the night wore on people made their way inside, desperate to avoid the bugs that were biting at their skin.

Tyler and Korey were bouncing from group to group in the house, mingling with all of their guests as laughter filled their home. The caterers carried around trays of food and champagne, usually barely making it out of the kitchen before it was gathered up.

Soon enough the waiters were gone and there was just a group of twenty slightly, okay very, intoxicated youtubers left in the living room. The Brits, a few American youtubers and I were sitting on the couches, chairs and floor as we talked. Well, I wasn't talking, but they were.

No one had noticed how I had stayed a bit distant from the group through out the night, or how even now I was sitting in a chair just slightly outside of the circle. If they had, no one bothered calling me out on it.

I sipped my beer, mad at myself for not enjoying the limited time I got to spend with everyone. Nothing was wrong, nothing was bothering me, and I was most definitely not jealous I told myself.

I was not jealous of how Korey already got to see Tyler more than me.

I was not jealous of how they were living together, again.

I was not jealous that Tyler had talked to Siri more than me these past few days.

I was not jealous that Tyler seemed to flirt with everyone but me.

And I most definitely was not jealous about how Tyler was drooling over Marcus, as usual.

I quickly downed the rest of my beer as Marcus warped an arm around Tyler's shoulders and Tyler swung his legs over the others. I stood up abruptly, swaying slightly before mumbling something about needing another drink and made my way to the kitchen.

"Not jealous, not jealous, not jealous," I keep saying to myself like a mantra, ignoring the ache in my heart in hopes that more alcohol would numb it. I grab beer number, well I don't know which number since I lost count at ten, from the fridge and open the can. The cold liquid slides down my throat easily, the bitter taste not even bothering me at this point.

Leaning against the counter, I convince myself that I am not jealous. Why would I be? Friends don't get jealous. Nope, not jealous. There was something bothering me though, even I couldn't deny that. I probably just wanted some of Tyler's attention, was that weird? "Of course not," I whisper to myself, kicking the ground as I sipped my drink. I just missed my best friend. Living on opposite sides of the world, away from your best friend was never easy and with the busy year we have had, we had even less time to Skype. Only a year ago we would Skype everyday, sometimes twice a day. Now we barely had time to Skype each other a few times each week. And now, when we were finally reunited after months, Tyler was practically ignoring me for Marcus. I sighed and took another swing of my drink, being too lost in my thoughts to notice that I wasn't alone in the kitchen anymore.

"You okay, Troye?" Zoe asked, bringing my attention to her presence.

"Yeah?" I questioned quietly, knowing that she wouldn't actually fall for the lie as she walked to the fridge next to me. Still, I hoped that she wouldn't push the issue.