common enemy [Ryuji Sakamoto x Reader]

chapter twelve: realization

You killed us.

You gripped your fist tighter, your nails digging into the palm of your hand. Maybe the pain would distract you from the accusations that flooded your mind.

They're right.

I did kill them.

It's all my fault.

I shouldn't have-

"(F/n)...?" Your thoughts were interrupted by a concerned Ryuji peering into your face. You blushed at his close proximity. "Are you okay? You look even more tired than you usually do."

He was right. The previous night's nightmare was unlike any you had experienced before. It tore your heart into pieces. As a result, the dark circles under your eyes were prominent, regardless of the amount of makeup you had tried to cover them with. You had been staring out the classroom's window, pointlessly hoping that nobody would notice.

"I'm fine." You bit back the urge to cry in that instant, facing him and relaxing your hand. You didn't want to concern him any more than you already had. "Just not a morning person."

"Hm... No sassy comment? There really is something wrong with you." He looked down at your hand, his eyes widening. "What the hell, (F/n)?! You're bleeding!"

You followed his gaze to see that your nails had punctured the skin on your palm. You hadn't even felt it.

"Oh."

"'Oh'? That's all you have to say?!" He pulled a bandage out of his bag and wiped the blood off of your hands. He peeled the wrapper off and gently pressed it over your palm. A warm feeling filled your chest as he held your hand in his, reminding you of your newfound feelings.

Suddenly, the question popped into your head as to why he had first aid experience to begin with.

"Why do you carry bandages around with you? And you're good at applying them." You observed, hoping to glean some information out of him.

"Thanks, I'm used to it." The words had spilled out of his mouth naturally, surprising you.

"You're used to it? How often are you getting hurt?"

"Ah... Well..." His eyes widened as he slowly realized what he had said. "Ann is really clumsy! So I carry these around in case she hurts herself, you know?"

"I see..." Although his answer was more than just unconvincing, you couldn't help but be jealous that Ryuji had brought her up so easily.

Ryuji seemed relieved that you bought his obvious excuse. He finished applying the bandage, changing the subject in the process. "Anyway... What happened to sharing everything with each other? You know you can tell me when you're upset, right?"

"Yeah... I know." You had no desire to weigh Ryuji down with your own problems, yet you appreciated his offer.

"I'm not going to force you to tell me, but remember that I'm here if you need me."

"I just... It's not something I'm okay with sharing yet. I don't want to keep things like this from you, but now's not really the right time." You turned to look out the window again.

"Okay, just... let me know if you need anything." Ryuji finally gave up, sitting back at his desk. He leaned back and closed his eyes with a sigh.

I'm sorry...

•••

Damn it!

Ryuji silently cursed at himself as he made his way to the rooftop to meet his friends. He was absolutely sure something was wrong with you, and had tried his best to lift your spirts. However, no matter how many times he had talked to you or tried to make you laugh, you would simply smile and look away.

He could see right through that fake smile of yours; the pain you were experiencing presented itself in your eyes, and he was completely useless to help you. Regardless of how tempted he was to stay behind and comfort you as you had done for him, he had already promised to meet the team.

"Ugh..." Ryuji pulled at his hair in frustration, finally reaching the school's rooftop. She's probably pissed at me or something.

Ryuji looked up to see Akira, Ann, Yusuke, and Makoto staring at him.

Fuck... Must have mumbled out loud.

"Who's pissed at you? Did you get into a fight with (L/n) or something?"

"What?!" Ryuji immediately blushed. "Why would you think that?!"

"Because she's the only girl who voluntarily talks to you...?" Makoto answered. Ryuji scowled at her.

"Ryuji and (L/n) still aren't a couple yet?!" Ann interjected with a dramatic gasp. "I thought it would have happened by now..."

"What the hell?! Why would I date (F/n)?!"

"Ooooh! You guys are on a first-name-basis?!" Ann cooed as Ryuji set his bag down and slumped into a chair, kicking his feet onto a nearby desk to distract himself from his perpetual embarassment.

"It's been pretty obvious to all of us that you have a crush on her..." Makoto sighed. Before Ryuji could refute her, his eyes widened as he slowly came to realize what Makoto had said.

I... Have a crush on her...?

His obvious facial expression revealed that he had just discovered how deep his feelings truly ran.

Yusuke covered his mouth with fake surprise. "He's finally self-aware...!"

The group laughed at Ryuji's pink cheeks as Akira called everyone to attention.

"Now that we're on the subject..." He began, his expression turning serious, "There's a few things I think I should share about (L/n) that you guys may find interesting."