３：１０ａｍ • 「ｎｏｍｉｎ」

10

warning: some nsfw/sexual talk

October 8, 6:30am

     Jaemin groaned in exasperation as his alarm woke him up from a night of dreamless sleep. He rubbed the tiredness out of his eyes, trying to find the motivation to get out of bed. He almost broke out in tears again, he didn't want to be like this again. Recovery was a long road he thought he had conquered. He felt hopeless again. He shook the thoughts out of his head, seperating himself from the warmth and comfort of his bed. 

     He looked at himself in the mirror, disgust lacing his features as he stared at his puffy eyes and dark circles under his eyes. His complexion was poor, his skin pale and shining with a thin layer of oil. He didn't wash his face last night and couldn't find it in himself to wash it now. He let a sigh fall from his lips, brushing his greasy hair with his fingers and trying to find something to wear today. 

     "Fuck it," Fell from his lips and he grabbed an old hoodie and sweatpants, throwing on some sneakers and heading off to school, not even realizing he forgot to eat breakfast. 

October 8, 7:30am

     Mark was still mad at Jaemin but as he watched Jaemin walk into class, he couldn't help but feel his heart wrench. Jaemin looked like shit and he was instantly concerned. This wasn't Jaemin. The Jaemin he knew was bright and always laughing and spreading love and supporting everyone. This Jaemin looked... Dead, tired, hopeless. Mark sighed and pulled out his phone, not caring that the bell was about to ring, signaling the start of school. 

October 8, 7:32am

New Message

mark: jeno i don't want to worry you but jaemin looks like absolute shit
like you don't understand 
he looks like an actual zombie

jeno: what am i supposed to do about that? he wont reply to me for shit
i've tried texting him so much but i feel like every time i try to talk to im i just drive him further and further away
i dont want to give up on him but this isnt good for my health
my grades are dropping and i've barely talked to anyone this week

mark: jesus christ 
i'll try to talk to him today i guess?

jeno: okay
kmp
cya

mark: bye

     Mark slid his phone back into his pocket and focused his attention back on Jaemin, taking in more of the boy's appearance. The most noteable feature was the boy's puffy eyes. It looked like he had been crying for hours. He felt himself frown. What happened to the boy that Mark didn't know?

October 8, 11:50am

    Lunch came and Mark was determined to talk to Jaemin. The boy look lost as he stood, searching for somewhere to sit. He made eye contact with Mark and the dark-headed boy instantly shot his hand up, waving for Jaemin to come over. Confusion crossed his face and he shook his head, looking over to Jaehyun's table and going over there instead. Mark sighed heavily. 

     Jaemin shakily walked over to Jaehyun and his friends, praying his legs wouldn't give out. He sits down and Jaehyun's hand finds purchace on his thigh, like always. And like always, it felt cold, harsh. Jaemin tried to keep still as Jaehyun's hand rubbed on his thigh. The seniors talked among themselves. Jaemin sat and picked at his food, never eating any of it. 

October 8, 2:30pm 

     The day passed quickly and uneventfully. Mark was full of worry. Jaemin was basically dead to his surroundings, barely reacting to anything. Jaemin just wanted to get home and go to sleep. The growl in his stomach became a trivial thing, the tiredness that coaxed his eyes to shut had faded over time. He wanted to get home and go to sleep. Sleep was his only way of escaping the thoughts that threatened to taunt him. When he could sleep, he didn't have any responsibilities.