New Perspective -Ryden-

Not That Tired After All

Ryan's POV:

We sat quietly for a few minutes, eating slices of pizza and occasionally looking at each other when we thought the other person wouldn't notice.

Once when I looked over at Brendon, he was looking at me. When we met eyes, I felt my cheeks get warm and a smile spread access his face. "You're blushing again."

"Shut up." I said in a little kid pouty voice. We both started laughing.

When it died down, we sat in silence for a few minutes until Brendon spoke.

"Hey Ryan," he asked.

I responded with a 'hmm' because my mouth was full.

"Uh," he paused. "Nevermind."

I swallowed my food and spoke. "No, tell me."

"Well, I was just kinda wondering..." He stopped talking and took a bite of his pizza.

"You don't want to go home, do you?" I know I didn't want Brendon to go home. I was having a good time, and he seemed to be too.

"No, no." He shook his head.

"Cool." I smiled.

There was a small period of silence before Brendon looked back at me and

"I kinda want to sing that song for our performance."

The smile on my face faded quickly. "You what?" I said flatly.

"I want to sing the song," he paused, "the one I read in your bedroom."

"Uh, Brendon, I don't know about that, I mean, you weren't even supposed to see that song..." I trailed off. I sounded so overly protective of that stupid notebook.

He just stared at me. "Why wasn't I supposed to see the song?"

"Because.... Well..." I sighed. "It's personal, Brendon." I looked at him, avoiding eye contact. "That notebook was really personal..."

I looked at him again, his face was curious. "What was so personal about it..?" He asked.

I looks back down again, my voice almost to a whisper. "I... I don't wanna talk about it."

He looked at me with nothing but sympathy in his eyes. I kept my head facing my feet, screwing my eyes shut.

Memories came flooding back, flashes of things being thrown at me, being hit and called names. I felt as if I was going to have a meltdown, tears threatening to spill from my eyes. I sighed, but it was more like I wept.

"Ryan," Brendon whispered, lifting my chin up to look at him.

"Ryan, I would never judge you. I hope you know that, you're like a brother to me." He looked down, as if fighting the urge to cry himself. "I hate seeing you like this, I hate it. I wish you'd tell me what was going on. I want to help you, Ryan.."

He looked at me. I was full on crying now, his words meant more than life itself to me at that moment. Brendon pulled me into a tight hug and I cried into the shoulder of his black t-shirt. He cooed, trying to calm me down.

"If only y-you k-knew how much that m-means to me, B-Brendon." I murmured into his shirt.

He lowered his head down to where it was beside mine, and whispered in my ear. "Tell me, Ryan. Tell me what's wrong..."

I lifted my head up, my vision blurry from the tears, and sighed. He gave me a small smile and squeezed my hand reassuringly.

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