I'm fucking alone. When will this end? Fucking forever?
I spun the cherry from my drink using the stirrer. The cherry goes around hitting every part of the glass while my mind wonders at every possible reasons out there I could think of on why did he leave me.
Why did the fuck did he?
I swallowed the vodka and it tasted bad. Just like fucking poison. I can't hear anything because of the loud beats and noises the club is making. But why is that I can still hear his voice? I promised myself not to cry on him and that I should start living my life the way I should.
"Am I not enough? I did everything, fucking everything for him"
At this point I can't help but feel bad for myself and cry. I always hate this part. I drank again but this time a long ass sip. I feel woozy and everything looks so blurry now. Fuck, I need to smoke.
I started searching for the new pack I bought when I passed by 7/11 on the way here.
"Shit! Where is i—
"Now let us all welcome Billie Eilish!"
Everyone started clapping and shouting
Who is this girl? And where the fuck is my pack. I looked at the chair beside and it was just on it.
"Finally"
I was just about to leave for awhile when I
heard someone singing
Don't you know I'm no good for you?
I've learned to lose you, can't afford to
I looked at her and wow she's breathtaking. The way her eyes looked when the lights were on her, it fits perfectly with her hair too.
Tore my shirt to stop you bleeding
But nothing ever stops you leaving
I looked down and felt everything. I'm really close to the stage and I can see her properly but I decided not to look.
Quiet when I'm coming home, I'm on my own
I could lie and say "I like it like that, like it like that"
I could lie and say "I like it like that, like it like that"
I hate this song. I can't do this.
Don't you know too much already?
I'll only hurt you if you let me
I looked up and I caught her already staring at me. We stared at each other and she started smiling. She closed her eyes and looked up. The way she scrunched her nose when she started singing again
Call me friend, but keep me closer
I'll call you when the party's over
I realized and snapped back to reality when I remembered I really need to go outside.
I stood up and went outside to smoke
~~
I inhaled the toxic and exhaled it out
Fuck this
I inhaled again and kept it longer inside
Fuck him
I closed my eyes to feel the warmness it gave me and exhaled it out
Fuck every—
"Hi"
I turned my back and saw her. She's smaller than I thought she looked, but she's pretty.
