FALL AWAY💀⌠J.T⌡

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If Josh had been told a year ago that at any point in time he'd have to muzzle his best friend to keep him from killing someone, he'd have laughed in the face of whoever had supplied the prediction. "You're insane," Josh would've guffawed, doubling over. "Tyler couldn't hurt anybody unless they threatened someone he cared about."

Tyler was fierce. He was loud and brash and passionate. Strong, determined, stubborn, goofy, protective, loyal. He was careful and careless at the same time. Outgoing and reserved. Honest and secretive. An open book and an enigma. A walking oxymoron, a personified juxtaposition. It was something Josh had always loved about him.

"How can you stand to be around me?" Tyler would ponder to him on those late nights. "Hmm?" Josh would hum back, questioning. "You call me a breathing contradiction. Doesn't it get tiring? Dealing with that? Dealing with me?"

"No," Josh would answer, no pause, no hesitation. "Means I'll never be bored"

They'd lie on Josh's raggedy couch, feet adjacent to the other's head, and stare at the dull, beige ceiling. Tyler hated that ceiling; Josh hated it too. "If your landlord didn't have a cactus up his ass, we could paint that ceiling," Tyler used to say. "Something loud."

Josh would laugh. "Loud?"

"Yeah, man," Tyler would nod, completely serious. "Loud. Bold. Like... I don't know, red. Yeah, red. Can't you see it?" He'd stick his hand in the air, palm flat, parallel to the ceiling, wiggling his fingers like the blood in his veins could seep from his fingertips and drown the white desert above them in a brilliant scarlet.

"What about... blue?" Josh murmured one night. Tyler shuffled, sitting up.

"Blue?"

"Yeah, like... the night sky just after the sun's set. Navy blue, midnight blue." Tyler stared at Josh who was watching the ceiling in thought. Slouching once more, Tyler rested his head on the couch pillow and imagined the twinkling of dying stars above them, the moon hanging among the shimmering specks of glitter.

"Yeah," Tyler whispered, closing his eyes. "Blue would be nice."

The first week after the infection broke out found the pair camping under the cover of trees. With only two sleeping bags Michael and Mark took one while Tyler and Josh took the other. That night was Mark's turn to keep watch. They were supposed to be getting as much rest as possible, but Tyler couldn't sleep. They'd set up camp in a clearing among the thick forest of trees that night, and the open sky was laid out above them for him to marvel at, basking in the moonlight through the flutter of stray leaves.

"Josh," he whispered, nudging the other man. They'd been back to back when Tyler rolled to stare at the sky. His shoulder was digging into Josh's spine. Josh made a sleepy sound in the back of his throat. "Josh, look," Tyler tried again, making him moan in annoyance.

"Go back to sleep, Ty," Josh gruffed, rubbing his cold nose with his arms held tight to his chest. Though he was grumpy, he shuffled closer to Tyler and his body heat anyway. Their legs were tangled together in the sleeping bag, hidden from view, a secret for only them to share.

"But look, Josh, the sky," Tyler murmured, holding his hand out to the heavens like he used to do back on that raggedy couch in that boring apartment. The wind bristled the hair on his arm, and goosebumps stood to attention across his skin.

Josh turned his head and blinked blearily at Tyler's hand and then looked to the sky.

"Beats any apartment ceiling on the planet, huh?"

Josh stared in wonderment at the vast expanse of sky above them. He flopped onto his back at the same time Tyler turned on his side, his chest pressing against the muscle lining Josh's shoulder. Josh watched a sleepy, blissful smile blossom on Tyler's face before he burrowed his head under Josh's chin, warming his nose in the fabric of his hoodie. His legs bent and straddled Josh's hip, arms coming to rest across his chest. "That's a midnight blue if I've ever seen it," Tyler mumbled. The hair on the top of his head tickled Josh's neck.

Josh felt frozen, the steady weight of Tyler's head pressuring down on his ribs; he feared the other man could hear the pounding of his heart hitch. "Hey," Tyler whispered. Josh forced out a strangled, "Hmm?" and Tyler shifted, pulling Josh's arm out from its cramped position tucked into his side until it was out and wrapped around his lithe shoulders.

"As crazy and messed up as this situation is, I'm glad I'm here. With you," he mumbled out. Josh wished he could see his eyelashes flutter drowsily, see the dopey smile on his face.

While Tyler drifted off into sleep, lulled by Josh's heartbeat and the steady rise and fall of his chest, Josh willed himself to relax. He'd been sleeping mere minutes ago, why was he suddenly so awake?

Tyler let out a gentle chuff into his chest, nuzzling the soft, worn cotton of his hoodie.

Oh, he thought. That's why.