Unlove You in 5 Ways

#5

UNLOVING

Finally, we have come to the part we have been waiting for, the UNLOVING. After the rollercoaster of thoughts I have decided to unlove you Yto, not because I fell out of love but because I came to the point of letting you go, of letting my self go.Sky from 13 reasons why said that "I can let you go and still love you" so this chapter isnt suppose to be UNLOVING but LETTING GO rather.

We can never unlove someone, the love we have for them just gets weaker, they go down our priority list and the world shaking or total calmess, as well as the butterflies and heart attacks will cease to exist. But you know, deep down, you still love. You still love but its not as strong, you will meet someone you will love more than I love Yto Jose.

You can never unlove a person. The leftover conversations are kept in our subconsious and it will either make us bitter or thankful. We cannot erase the memories (or in my case, imagination) with someone. There is no such thing as unloving because no matter how hard I try I just can't unlove my Yto. But please, I hope and pray that I will have the courage to let you go.

It is said that holding on to forbiden love is like holding on to a rope coiled in your hands, the more you gold on, the more you hurt yourself, so here is me, on behalf of all the girls that fell in love with a fictional character, letting go.

I will let you go now Yto, I will no longer think of our what ifs, I will no longer long to see you, I will no longer aim to meet you, see your shadow or breath the same air you are breathing, I just want you to stay, forever, in the pages of a book, in the screen with your dark eyes and devil heart on black ink.

But then as I write this to you Yto, I realized another thing, we cannot let go of the things we do not have. What am I suppose to do now Yto? Im lost and confused, what would I make of thing "feelings" I have for you? What would happen to my baby heart? Im lost.

Maybe (we are back on the maybes) maybe you are meant to stay in my life, but I will sort of let you go, like what I have said, you will go down my priority list, I will feel something stronger for another person, and the butterflies on my stomach will die but you will stay in my mind heart Yto. You will no longer be the Yto Jose Ybarra Consunji that I love with all his ruthlessness and dark eyes and power and perfection and flaws, you will now be Yto Jose Ybarra Consunji, a guy I fell in love with, my greatest what if, my fictional zing, my foreber hubby, a dream I have stopped pursuing. My definition of you will change and that might be the extent of all this words I have written.

After remeniscing, after erasing, after the denial and the acceptance, I have failed to unlove you, I was only able to change your label in my life. And that YTO JOSE YBARRA CONSUNJI is me Sheryl Santillan UNLOVING you, this is the 5th and final way Yto, until we cross paths again. Remember you are my greatest what if and as long as the Mother of all Consunji is alive, as long as there is one BB that knows a Consunji I will never get over my what ifs, but I will no longer wait for these what ifs to be answered, cause you are nothing now but a bittersweet memory. I lve you Yto, (no scratch that) I loved you Yto, and after 5 ways, I unloved you...