The End of Our Stars

Chapter 3

CHAPTER 3

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We’re as likely to hurt the universe as we are to help it, and we’re not likely to do either. He wrote that. He wrote that in the eulogy. He wrote that in this book now. And I couldn’t say truer things than he did.

Chapter two might have been the longest chapter I have ever read. Van Houten had been generous to Augustus. I don’t know if that’s a cancer perk or if Van Houten truly liked Gus and his take of the novel. Either way, it’s written. It’s printed. It is here with me—the last piece I could ever have with Augustus and his voice and his words.

“Hazel. It’s time.” Mom said as she wakes up. It’s morning, very early in the morning. Maybe I’ve flipped through more pages than I thought and fell asleep as I did so. But I do not remember falling asleep. I remember him. And I remember him holding my hand as I read.

Doctor Maria enters and talks to my parents, settling me as we prepare for the tests and the release and I could blur through this whole process. I could be a shade like a cloud passing through the earth, trailing shadows at their wake.

When it was time for me to go home, I receive a call from Isaac. “Hey,” I said.

“Heard you were rushed to the hospital last night,” he said.

“Yeah, you’ll be hearing that ever so often twice a week, probably,”

“Yeah,”

“So. You woke up early, I guess. What are you doing?” I ask.

“Well, I’m having my mother drive me up to your house so you could receive a well-planned welcoming party and we’ll head straight on out on videogames.”

“Isaac.”

“Oh sorry, are you tired? This was a bad idea.” And he starts talking to his mom. “Yeah, I think we should head back—yeah, I know you said that—Mom could you just?”

“No, no,” I said quickly to catch his attention.

“What? Did you say something?”

“You could come over. I’ve had enough rest to last a lifetime anyways.” I lied and I know that made Isaac smile.

“Okay. We’ll wait for you in about ten minutes.” And he hangs up. I turned to Mom who was looking expectant at me.

“That was Isaac.”

“Good,” she said, nodding. “You need company every now and then.”

“I think this is going to be an everyday thing, Mom.” I tell her and she raises a brow. “I don’t think Isaac wants to lose another friend.”

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Just like yesterday, Isaac was waiting. This time, he was sitting on our front porch. Dad greets him on the way and helps him stand up.

“Good morning, Mister Lancaster.” Isaac said and Dad claps his shoulder.

“Come in for breakfast.” Mom said as she carries Philip behind me.

“Hazel?”

“Hi, Isaac,” I take his arm and escorted him inside. “Where’s your mom?”

“She left. Graham has school.” He replies and I nodded and felt stupid for doing that. I mean, how could he even see that I nodded? Stupid, stupid, stupid—

“Sit around the table, dear; I’ll get started on some pancakes.” Mom tells us and she hands me Philip. I drag him by me as we make our way to the kitchen.