Anyway imagine the scene: New York city a few years ago a great hurricane is upon the city but the tornado has sharks in it and our hero Flinn Shepard has to protect the city and his family.
Oh wait.
Thats sharknado 2.
Anyway imagine a beautiful forest, creatures everywhere, birds singing songs, crunchy leaves underfoot , lovely clean fresh air and finally imagine an immortal dunder head with socks on his hands, running around a swing like a retard and foaming at the mouth. This is the reeman.
Some say he was made by the trees some say he was made by mother nature herself but I personally think that he was made so we could tell stories about that creepy dude near Tescos in the woods stuffing his face with a meal deal and yelling his catchphrase: Reeeeeeeeee!
Anyway I'm getting a little carried away.
Back before time itself the reeman roamed the woodlands with a kazoo and a deranged dream. The magical forest he lived in was only acsessable by one way: on a Tesco trolley. Well it was a normal forest anyway but if you ride in on a Tescos trolley you'll see the magical forest. Random I know but Im the narrator so my story......
Anyway, one day in the reeman had ventured out of the forest to get a Tesco meal deal but her was met by a group of men in suits and holding silenced pistols. As he went in for his sandwich they took a metal spoon from the cutlery secroom and impaled the reeman through the abdomen with it the shooting him with truth darts from their pistols.
Then they dragged him out the store and took them into their white government van.
Inside the back of the van their was a chair and a pair of handcuffs.
When the reeman woke he was chained up with a man holding a scapel.
"How the fuzzy do we get in this magical forest female doggo!!!(keeping it 100% family friendly pg clean)"
The men yelled.
" For every minute that passes without you telling us how to get to it you lose a body part" one of the men yelled.
Then one of the men in the background started doing take the L.
" C'mon Jameson you need to stop doing dances from fortnite now it's becoming a serious problem now" another man replied
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When they were distracted using masterful impulses the reeman had unchained his handcuffs and had began to garrot one of the guards before the others realised. Suddenly the guard built like a tank picked the reeman up and slammed into the vans roof while he his abdomen was pierced by a guard holding a scapel.
He blacked out again.....
Seriously he should stop doing tha-......
The reeman woke up duck taped inside a Tescos trolley like he was in some sort of 24 hour challenge on YouTube . The guards told him how they had studied his brain and knew how to access the magical forest. Without warning, he pushed the trolley into the forest beyond...
Before we go any further leave a top in the comments 4 reeman.
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They had entered the forest. Vivid lights illuminated the men in suits eyes as they entered the forest. But they did not know the ancient tribesmen were watching. These tribesmen hailed the reeman remain for one reason not that he watched all the sharknados in a day or that he can cook minute rice in 58 seconds but for the fact he could not Sue no matter what. The tribesmen were angered at the men in suits presence they would not obet they would destroy.
24 men.
23 men.
22 men.
21 men.
20 men.
Suddenly they realised, blow darts flew through the air and spears were flung into the unsuspecting backs of agents.
Only 5 remained.
They dived into the undergrowth. This was the only was that they could escape their situation. But they couldn't escape the forest the trolley had disappeared.
2 days later...
The five men had survived out in the forest for 2 whole days now. They seemed to be getting their bearings. Suddenly the reeman thundered through the trees. He bashed two of the men's skulls in with a single Rock , ripped out one of the men's hearts and ripped the penetimate man in half.
Only one remained now.
"Who do you work for?" yelled the reeman.
"I'll never tell" replied the man whole popping a cyniade tablet. His mouth began to foam. The reeman ripped out his earpiece .
A voice granted him:
" Hello reeman --- No move my pig riding contest with Mr Putin to Wednesday thank you Patricia. As I was saying before I was interupted by my secretary Reeman I will be keeping a close eye on you and you will be my prize possession. I can't laugh as I have a sore throat but if you could imagine a malevolent evil laugh that would be appreciated. President out!"
And with that the earpiece exploded and the games began..
