You told me that you're my best friend and that you love me but I'm here, watching from a distance as you go on with your life without so much as acknowledging my existence.
I used to think that this is it, this is how it feels like to have someone who cares. To open up to somebody. To let their lives intertwine with yours emotionally. To be so affected by them. Maybe I am capable of maintaining friendsip because she's always there, and our late night conversations remind me how we once were because our friendship has been irreparably broken and we're just starting to drift apart. And it hurts because I care about her. A lot.
In one moment of vulnerability, you and I became inseparable, you're the only person who knows the real me, you know that I'm not just the quiet girl and I thought you understand my problems. But now I realise that you don't even need me at all. That I don't mean that much to you. That obviously you couldn't care less how I'm dying inside when we walk past each other and the silence greets us like we're distant strangers.
Just keep ignoring me I'll pretend to not care. Go on having fun with your friends, like I'm not even there. I'll try to forget this hurt. I'll try to forget that I ever had so much as a confidential human contact. I'll go back to being reclusive. Treating back into the shadows like waves receding into the ocean. As per usual norm. As was status quo. Because I was born to be the lonely loner.
