Succumb (A Severus Snape Fanfiction)

|chapter four|

Warning: Mature Content.

A/N: This chapter is also mostly just rewording.

A knock sounded at the door of my apartment, though this time I was expecting my late night visitor. Instead of getting up, I flicked my hand toward the door, willing a tendril of a shadow to slither out and open it for me.

"It's quite late you know," Severus admonished as he stepped in and shut the door behind him and nearing the table with a faint smile that told me he didn't actually mind.

"Oh, please. It's not even midnight, you weren't sleeping," I responded with a slight grin of my own, though my eyes were still glued to the stack of newspapers I was rummaging through. "The other morning when I left here to meet with the Dark Lord, I was asked to retrieve any memories concerning the Order from some bloke called Atticus Fimble. Do you know of him?"

"I do, actually. Fimble runs a black market for cursed items. Not your typical Borgin and Burkes items, though. The things he can acquire are far more precious, as well as dangerous."

"Well thank goodness. I was about to go mad searching for him. Do you have any idea what business the Order would have with such a man?"

"Not at all. I don't think the  Order wouldn't have reason to get mixed up in Fimble's business. He keeps the company of some rather morally questionable people," Severus replied, taking a seat next to me.

"I told Voldemort I didn't find anything, but there was a memory I got out of him involving Remus Lupin and Nymphadora Tonks. They were meeting in some shady looking pub or restaurant, and Lupin purchased an item from him. Fimble was quite nervous about whatever was in that package, and he asked Lupin who he intended to use such a thing on.. Do you have any ideas of what it could have been?

"Unfortunately I do not, and with Albus gone and my involvement in his death, I have no way of finding out through any of the Order's members," Severus answered in an apologetic tone.

"I guess I'll have to hunt him down and ask him myself." I resolved, earning a doubtful look from Severus.

"And you're nosing around in the Order's business why again?" he asked.

"Because you said yourself that they planned on taking me down if I were to ever give into my powers. And now I have. What if it was something meant for me? I just keep getting this nagging feeling it has something to do with me."

"I doubt it had anything to do with you," Severus replied nonchalantly, but he wore an unsure expression. Had Order had found a weapon they thought worthy to come after me with? As far as they were concerned, I was a monster now. An evil killing machine without a soul. To be perfectly honest, that wasn't far from the truth those days, and it wasn't like Severus would be able to vouch for me when they decided to come after me. They hated him even more than me now, or was I just being paranoid?

Severus scooted in closer and placed his hand over mine, stilling it. I hadn't even realized my hands were shaking until then. "When's the last time you slept, Kathryn?"

"I've been sleeping just fine," I lied.

"Why must you be so stubborn?" Severus asked sounding quite exasperated.

"I haven't left the apartment since that day. I haven't gotten to... use my powers," I said lamely. We both knew what I meant was that I hadn't hurt anyone in days. The desire to do something awful was excruciating, and for the millionth time since the night I lost in that pub I regretted giving in so easily.

"You're stronger than the darkness, Kathryn," Severus said softly as he traced soothing circles along my wrist. I resisted the urge to roll my eyes at his statement. If I was stronger than the darkness, I certainly wouldn't be withdrawing from the lack of it's use.