HI! So to everyone reading this story, you few wonderful people. Thank you so much. I know this is taking a while. But life is busy you know! I'm job hunting and taking care of my Grandma who just had knee surgery. Busy busy life. Well, please keep reading. It's going to pick up pretty soon and then get really exciting. :P
Lot's of Love!
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Block it out. Block everything out. I’m okay, he’s not going to hurt me. Block it out, nothing else exists.
I keep chanting the same thing over and over again, trying to block the world out. I don’t want to feel this afraid any more. I’m so tired of feeling afraid. I don’t know what exactly happened after I started to panic, but the next thing I know I’m waking up in my room, tucked into bed. Somehow I was brought home. I wonder if Clara was the one who did it.
I check my phone, which is in my pocket still and see that it is already late in the day. I must have been out for a couple hours. That means I missed all my classes! I’ll have to email my teachers and ask for my work to be sent to me. But…That’s not the problem here is it.
I thought I saw him. I passed out because I thought I saw him, but I don’t even know if it was for sure. It could have been just another blond guy on campus. I guess I’m not so over this whole thing, if just the thought of seeing him sends me into such a panic.
And, it was in front of Clara. She’ll never believe me that I’m okay now. She knows something is wrong for sure. How will she let me be now. I’ve probably worried everyone, I need to go tell them I’m okay now…and maybe go for a swim in my pool. I need a dip to relax. It’s been a while since the last time I had a nice swim.
I throw the covers off me and step off the bed. I’m not sure who all is still around, but I guess I’ll go see. When I peak outside my room I see a few maids talking at the end of the hall. With the creak of the door opening they turn and see me. Quickly they rush over to me with concerned looks.
“Miss! Are you okay now?”
“You should be in bed Miss, please lay down and let me fetch you something to eat.”
“Do you need us to call you a doctor?”
“No!” I wave my hands quickly and step back in the hallway. “I…I’m fine really. Um…Is my friend Clara still here? Or…was she ever here?”
“She was for a bit, but left a while ago. She said to tell you to call her when you wake up.”
“Oh…okay.” I nod. “Um…I’m going to go for a swim.”
They nod and let me go back into my room to pick a bathing suit out of my closet. I don’t really care which one I pick, so I just grab the closest one, which happens to be a dark green one piece that wraps around my with lots of folds. It’s a pretty suit, but nothing special.
I change into it and head down to the pool. I just want to dip into the water and try and get rid of this lingering anxiety. Swimming has always helped me to unwind. I step into our pool and breath in the warm chlorine smell. Comforting and familiar. Not as good as salt water, but it’s sufficient for now. I don’t know how long it will take for me to go back to the ocean, buut I really hope someday I can. I loved the ocean, I loved swimming in it and watching it. I enjoyed everything related to it, even on stormy nights when it’s choppy and a mixing bowl of whipped up fury. It’s beautiful in every way. Too bad, for now I just can’t go.
