Negan X Reader (COMPLETED ✔)

Chapter 30 Gone

I can't completely read his emotions it's a mix of uncertainty and empathy.

"I met with your father today; he wants to see you"

I sigh deeply and roll my eyes. "Why? So he can tell me how terrible of a daughter I am"

He sits down next to me "it's serious, baby" his eyes show the type of concern that I rarely see from him. He lays his hand lightly on my thigh and instead of being soothed like I am usually, it frightens me.

He leaves his hand there and speaks with such a soft voice, that his tone worries me more than the words he's saying.

"Who died?" I ask him under my breath.

In a world like this, it's only a matter of time until I lose the next person I love.
Life and death are one thread, the same line viewed from different sides.

"It's not my place to say, but I can take you to Alexandria if you want"

I stand up without saying a word and walk to the closet. I quickly dress as Negan is on the bed watching.

~

Gazing straight ahead, only half-aware of what's outside the comfort of the car. Negan's hands stroking the wheel, the almost countless changing of direction, puts me into a hypnotic state.

We both step out of the car, seemingly slower than usual. All the tiny hairs covering my body stands up as we get closer to my family's house.

Negan and I don't speak on our walk, I only glance at him a few times to try to see where his mind is at.

Our footsteps journey up the porch.

He takes the initiative and modestly knocks on the door. My eyes shut as I mentally prepare for the worst. My breath catches in my throat when the door opens revealing my father.

He is silent but motions us in. My feet feel so heavy that they drag as I cross the threshold.

The three of us enter the dining room, but none of us sit. I look into Rick's eyes, their dead and defeated, though he doesn't shed a tear.

"Where's Carl?"

Negan instantaneously puts his face into his hands.
My father approaches me, hugging me for the first time in so long, "y/n.... he's gone".

My heart skips a beat and in a reactionary moment, I push him back, "you're lying!" I scream, tears forming in my eyes causing my vision to become blurred.

I feel two arms wrap around my waist and comforting lips kiss my neck. "He's telling the truth, sweetheart" Negan whispers.

Sorrow tightens in my chest, as if the muscles are trying not to let another breath in, but instead to die. Then the breath comes, shallow, lungs unable to move much against the suddenly heavy ribs.

My mind becomes static, thoughts making no sense, replays of old memories once forgotten.

I grab onto a chair to support myself but before I know it I'm on the floor, limbs unwilling to work at all.

Both Negan and Rick try to calm me, as all three of us are on the floor. My father pulls me into his arms, rocking me back forth and Negan brushes the hair out of my face, "we're gonna get through this, honey, Carl wouldn't want you to give up".

I can't bring myself to speak. I cry as if my brain is being shredded from the inside. Pain flows out of every pore.

Rick's eyes shift to Negan, "let's get her to the couch".

They team up to lift me, as my legs dangle in the air.

My lungs finally feel relief when the back of my head touches the cushion. My hand ventures to my growing belly, the baby begins kicking.

My father stares at the movement. He hasn't seen me since I first told him I was pregnant.

My tears slow down, and I can see his hand reaching towards me, "H-He's never gonna get to meet the baby" my voice cracks.

"It's going to be okay, y/n, he loved both of you".

"How did it happen?"

He wipes his eyes, "he got bit, saving Judith".

A small smile forms on my face, thinking back to all the times he had saved me. "I'm so proud of him"

"me too" he hugs me again as Negan stands and watches.

We mourn together as the hours past.

Rick apologizes for being distant, and I apologize for not considering his feelings when making certain decisions.
Negan mostly stays to the side and allows us our time alone.

I never thought we would be in this position, with all three of us getting along. Negan even offers to create an alliance between the saviors and the Alexandrians.
Rick was hesitant and said he'll think about it but I have hope that it will work out.

~

Later that night, we ride back to the Sanctuary. I sit in the passenger's seat, as I play with Carl's hat in my hands. My dad told me, that before he died he mentioned that he wanted my baby to have it.

"It's a new day sweetheart" my love suddenly begins to speak. I look at him and force myself to smile.

"Imagine what the saviors could be with the all those extra resources" his grin grows bigger, and he licks his lips, putting his warm hand onto my belly.

"Resources? Really? I don't care about resources, I just lost my brother" I turn away from him crossing my arms in front of my chest.

"Half brother, remember" his voice is cold.

"What are you getting at?" The anger inside of me fights to take control. I know Negan has always had a malicious and calculated side but since I've been pregnant, it seemed as though that part of him was disappearing.

"Nothing, pumpkin, calm down" he chuckles.
I look back down into my lap and shake my head.

I don't feel like arguing tonight, whatever is going through his mind can be dealt with later.