In Black and White

Chapter 5: 10/8/1965

I haven’t seen Melanie since we kissed back at Tim’s. Today I went to Lakeside. I had to find out what had happened with her. I didn’t care how much they might beat me up. All I cared about was her. When I walked down the street, as I neared the school, more and more people started giving me looks. This wasn’t like when I first went visited Lakeside, or when people occasionally saw us walking together on the street. This was something more. Something questioning; demanding. As though asking me why I had done something, how I could possibly do something like that. Some had tears in their glares, some just anger. I went on to the front gates, determined to find out what happened. Maybe I could have walked away, lived in denial the rest of my life. Maybe that would have been better.

I started questioning every student I could find. Some just slapped or punched me, some walked away, some ignored me, and some cried, but eventually I found out the truth. Police had found her body, sliced at the neck, left on the side of the road, all because word had gotten out that we kissed. No one knew who had killed her. It could have been anyone, a black or white, an employee at Tim’s, a student at one of our schools, her ex-boyfriend, maybe even her…parents.

I left the school with a broken nose, black eye, a sting in my step, and a screaming gut, feeling worse inside. It was all my fault.

If I hadn’t stopped to talk to her, if I hadn’t written that stupid message, if I hadn’t kissed her, none of this would have happened. If I had some common sense, If only I thought about the consequences, if I had only been more careful, she would still be alive.

If only.