"Your not weak Cat!" Her arms tighten around me in reassurance but I can only smile faintly because the truth was pretty damning. My past has melded me into the fragile being that I am today but I can't face my fears and my nightmares because I'm too afraid of having my trauma walking around as a living tormentor.
"It's okay Celia, I'm not going to cry over it," there's a touch of melancholy in my voice as I say this and she quickly moves away to scan my face, her arms resting against my shoulders.
"It's okay to cry, I don't know why you bottle your pain away, and don't you want to feel a sense of release?"
"I'm a grown up now remember? I have to deal with my suffering on my own, besides, crying never solves anything and I have to focus on making money. Bills don't pay themselves."
What I really wanted to say was, 'Yes' but in my situation, crying and breaking down is a luxury – something I can't afford. I'm already an emotionally unstable wreck, I didn't need to go showcasing my emotions to the rest of the world, putting them on display for others to see because let's face it – people don't even give a damn.
"It's moments like this where I wished my best friend wasn't such a realist." Frowning, I poke her in the stomach and she jumps back. "Call me whatever you want, but I hate talking about the past. I don't want to relive events I can avoid." I offer her a strained smile as she looks down at me skeptically and shakes her head before sighing and walking off back to the couch.
"It's up to you Cat, but just know you can cry in front of me and I won't judge. I promise okay?" Nodding my head in understanding, warmth spreads in me and my heart feels put at ease. Celia is my one confidant, the only person I can cling on to for support, and she didn't have to tell me in words that she'd be there for me – I knew.
"Thanks."
"And I'm sure Zander would let you cry on his shoulder too," a sly grin graces her face and the good mood in the air dissipates.
"Please, the man is so warped into himself to care about anyone else."
"I don't think so."
"I can still stab you with this pen you know?" Raising the ballpoint pen in my hand for her to see across the room, her grin vanishes and instead, she rolls her eyes at me.
"You don't have a violent bone in your body Cat."
"Oh?" Slowly getting out of my chair, I creep up to her and stick the pen near her face, right in front of her nose. Celia's eyes widen and I only laugh at her cross-eyed face.
"Okay, maybe you do."
"Hmm that's right, I'm more of a threat than you think."
"Yet, you nearly cried when I stepped on a worm."
"I was twelve at the time! God, don't even make me think about that awful day."
She smacks my arm, and I blink a few times to suppress the water about to ooze out of my eyes. God, I'm ashamed of my childish behaviour but I was a saint when it came to living creatures, I couldn't stand seeing people commit such subtle acts of cruelty...unless it was in a horror movie. I'd eat up a plate of goriness as long as it was on a television screen.
"Your one odd cookie." Shrugging my shoulders, I know she's voiced my exact thoughts but really, I was classified as sane so I'm not odd in the medical sense. I just had different ways of coping with things and my imagination has a tendency to run wild, even at the age of twenty-one but I'm a matchmaker and the job calls for someone with my...uniqueness?
"Whatever just don't make it a habit of calling me Cookie."
"Why?"
"Because I'm already called Cupcake, I don't need to be named after another dessert or treat!"
YOU ARE READING
The Matchmaker
RomanceCatherine Lewis is a shy, unsophisticated twenty-one year old with a secret. She's the most prominent matchmaker for the elite, the parents of the rich and famous come to her. But who will give her advice on love when she encounters the son of the...