Codex

4 - Pith of Self-Loathing

"Since when were you so smooth? 'Farewell'?" Donna cackled, "Oh and let's not forget 'forgive my tardiness'. Since when did you learn those complicated words?" she said sarcastically, belittling me for my usually over-casual manner of speech.

Damn right I'm smooth. You better recognise a ladies' man when you see one. I bet I could sweep you off your feet, easy. You won't be able to resist this.

She laughed even harder, an obnoxious guffaw, really. "Since when?! Hahaha, I haven't had a good laugh like that in a long time. Tell you what, ladies' man. If you score a girlfriend in one year from now, I'll teach you three spells. A really strong spell, a really useful buff, and a cooldown."

Whoa, whoa, whoa! You know you can't turn back on those words with me! I will nag you until you die again. You really wanna make a bet like that?

"Yeah. And if you don't get a girlfriend, you're going to have to do me a favour. A damn huge favour."

Deal, you got yourself a deal, Donna! As weird as the evening was, it paid off. I walked out the room calmly and the minute I closed the door I heard, "Is it done?" Needless to say, I wasn't aware I could make such a high-pitched sound when I jump.

"You really have a knack for doing that, huh?" I placed my hand on my chest and calmed myself, "Yes, I cured him. Well, she cured him," I pointed to the unusually quiet Hydra.

"Oh my!" Dawn's sister exclaimed, "Not only are you forceful, but lecherous too. What a pervert!"

"Damn right I am," I joked along. She walked me outside into the courtyard, "Hey, Eric, thank you. I owe you one."

"Yeah, yeah you do. How about you become my girlfriend for a few days?"

She tilted her head confusedly, then gave a malicious smile, "Sure. You made a bet, didn't you?"

"Are you psychic?"

"Maybe," she smirked. "By the way, the name's May," she stuck her hand out and I took it, "I'm Eri–well, I'm sure you already know that, stalker."

"So, boyfriend, what do you want to do? Seeing as we're couples and all."

I shrugged, "Don't know, magic has been my only girlfriend."

"Really? Well," she walked forward a little, "magic can't do this," and kissed me. No, not on my cheek, on my lips, tongue and everything, for an absurdly long time. Fate really shat on me that day, because Dawn appeared right in the middle of it, and I wasn't exactly resisting. The smile she came out with turned into a frown and she stormed back inside.

May stopped when she heard the door slam, she stared on in silence and puzzlement for a couple seconds, then released a little titter, then looked back at me, "Your 'only girlfriend', huh? Men are such liars. Well, don't worry about it."

About what?

"I'll talk to her, see you around," she waved me goodbye and I left.

Guess who owes me three spells?

"That's cheating, you can't just–"

Nope. You didn't specify. I've upheld the conditions given to me. I knew Donna was pissed, but she admitted defeat.

The next few days, I practiced a spell called Levitate. It did exactly what the name suggested, allowed the user to levitate about a foot above ground, but that wasn't all. It offered a sort of, telekinetic control of your own body. According to Donna, I could move about as fast as a galloping horse, which of course I tested and failed. The spell in itself was pretty easy, but maintaining a high speed was damn near impossible. Jogging speed was the best I could do. At least travelling to the Order was less of a chore.