This Is Me

11/4/18-11/11/18

Ok so, with the impending doom of not having internet looming over me these last two weeks, I didn't really take note of the specific events that happened within those two weeks. So, for the sake of my sanity (and my will to type), I'll pretend those weeks didn't exist and document last week, which is even still vague to me. 

Last Sunday was the marching band's championship competition. We had competitions all of that weekend and somehow managed to blow all of the competition away during those days. I was kinda sad at that moment about the fact of the season ending, but the thrill of getting all superior ratings was, as one can say, semi-intoxicating. No tears were shed. 

We had our competition concert that Wednesday afternoon. That also came with the awards ceremony. For my third year in a row, I wasn't even mentioned for a nomination for any awards. It's saddening to feel so...alone when surrounded by people you thought you could label as friends. Went home real tired and decided to game all that night and wake up nice and early for school after "taking a day off" a day before.

The rest of the week is basically the usual deal of high school grief and tangled feelings.

I ushered for my school's Into The Woods play and got numerous comments on how my maroon shirt was a good look on me. Made me feel good. Even think I got hit on by one of my male peers. Don't really know for sure tho...I'm not too bright on those things.

Last event of last week is actually what happened today like 20 minutes. Got a text from Drea saying we could no longer be friends. When I asked why, she told me she couldn't explain, but I knew why. Our friendship was just...painful to her. All I know is that I have to put her in the same place as Jacki. An ex who can't be friends with me anymore. 

It hurts but hey, that's life for ya.