the Wednesday girl- Demi Lovato

11

I felt my heart sink down into my underwear, as it was getting later and later and Reeka still hadn't come. I should've expected it though. I shouldn't have really thought she was gonna come as if nothing happened.
I had kissed her yesterday. I don't know what had come over me, but I couldn't hold myself back any longer and I'd grabbed her and kissed her. It lasted only for a few seconds, even though it felt like ages, cause I finally realized what I was doing. I had pulled away and she looked at me in utter shock. She hadn't responded to the kiss, but she hadn't resisted it either. She had just stood in complete surprise and not done anything. I wanted to apologize, but I also didn't. I wanted to, because I felt a little bad for jumping her like that. But I didn't want to, because I wanted to do it again. And I wanted her to kiss me back. And as I had been deciding whether I should say sorry or not, she took hold of my hand, squeezed it tightly and mumbled an 'I love you so much', before waking out of my house, closing the door behind her.
And then it was my turn to be confused. I didn't know what was happening now. She hadn't texted me and I didn't wanna be the first one to reach out this time. I wanted her to text me, to tell me everything was okay and I hadn't scared her off or anything. I'd attacked her with my kiss, I didn't need to bombard her with my texts too. At least, not until I knew she was okay with it.

But it was Wednesday night and I still hadn't seen her. She didn't walk by my house, like she usually did on Wednesdays. And I was trying to figure out if it was because of me, or something else was going on. I was wondering if she just didn't walk home today, or maybe she took a different route because she didn't wanna see me. I had a bit of a hunch that it was because of me that she was now gonna stop coming. And I wanted to punch myself for having ruined something that meant so much to me.
But even though I had a feeling she wasn't coming because of the kiss, I was also worried about her. Maybe I was thinking too much about myself and she wasn't coming because of a health issue. She'd told me she had a lot of those. And the last thing I wanted was for anything bad to happen to her. But it could just be that she had a doctor's appointment or something and that's why she wasn't coming today.
Tying to think of anything other then Reeka proved to be practically impossible and I was going crazy with worry and regret. But I knew I still had some work to do, so I busied myself as much as I could.

But on Friday I just had to know what was happening, so I texted her.
Everything okay? Sorry if I made you uncomfortable, you don't have to come by anymore if you don't want to. But please let me know that you're okay. I'm worried.
I hadn't gotten a reply and as much as I had the urge to text her again, I decided that if she wanted to answer she would. So for now I just had to keep calm and wait.

I'd managed to keep myself under control pretty well, but when I still hadn't heard or seen anything from Reeka by Sunday, I was actually worried. I called her phone a few times, but it went straight to voicemail every single time. And as much as I thought that it might've been a bad idea, I could not stop myself from driving over to her aunt and uncle's house. Even if she was gonna tell me to fuck off and she wanted nothing more to do with me, I had to know that she was okay. I would feel happier knowing she was healthy and just ignoring me, then waiting to find out if she was having problems again.
But when I came to their house and rang the bell, no one opened. And after ringing again and knocking and waiting for a few minutes, there was still no answer. Figuring that they weren't home, I decided to sit in my car for a little while to wait and see if they'll come back any time soon. After a few minutes I saw a guy walking up to the house and going in. I realized it was most probably her uncle, as he had a face that quite resembled his twin daughters. I had the biggest urge to go over to him and ask him where Reeka was, but I'd never seen him before and I didn't wanna be a creep. If it would've been one of her cousins, I would've definitely asked them. But since they didn't seem to be in their house as he was the only one who came, I decided to just go home. I couldn't sit and wait for her all day, as much as I wanted to. I just had to trust that she was okay and nothing horrible had happened to her.