Passion // punk harry styles a.u.

23

I gasped and felt like my whole world was crumbling before my eyes. The whole moment killed me with a bullet directed to my heart. I knew it shouldn't have bothered me considering that Harry and I weren't even dating, but for some reason it still hurt. I mean, he shouldn't have invited me here if he was going to makeout with somebody right in front of my face. The entire thing was so unfair. It was unfair to me and Harry knew it. But apparently it didn't seem like he really cared.

As I felt weak in the knees, it was like everything was in slow motion. All of the people around me slowed down, the music's beat drug on, and Harry's body movements were as slow as a snail as he touched the girl's lower back. I didn't know whether to cry or be completely furious at the moment, because well, I shouldn't care. I just didn't know why I felt so angry, lost, and hurt. It was like I was trapped in a dark room not knowing where to go. Why was my stomach feeling queasy? Why was my mind screaming Harry's name? Why was my heart yearing for his lips against mine? Why was my whole being shouting for him while I got weaker and weaker?

Because you are in love with him.

My eyes widened and my breath hitched. I couldn't be in love with Harry. The punk? No way. When the thought entered my mind it was like I was spinning around and around. I felt sick at the thought. I was scared and frightened at the fact that I was actually in love with Harry. I had to get it through my head that he has his life and I have mine. My life wasn't going to be spent with Harry. Harry is going to find a prettier girl than me and I'll find a guy with straight A's.

But I didn't want a guy with straight A's. I wanted Harry. I wanted his lip ring to be caught between my teeth when we kissed. I wanted his hair to tickle me when I hugged him. I wanted to see his smile every morning when I woke up next to him. I wanted his strong tattooed arms to be around me when we slept. I wanted him to sing me to sleep every night with his angelic voice. And when things started to get rough, I want to inhale his addictive scent and I wanted him to whisper in my ear that everything was going to be alright.

Then I realized something. Harry seemed so far away. It seemed as if he was on the other side of the world. I can never get to him. I can never hold him close. I will never have a true kiss from Harry; the kind that sends you into orbit and makes you feel like you have your own little world. I will never get to say 'I love you' to him, because he's so far away. The passion for Harry was eating me alive and I couldn't escape its grasp. I needed out of that wretched house immediately. I needed to run away. Far, far away.

At that moment, Harry caught my eye and his eyes widened. I felt tears burning in my eyes as I stared at him. He pushed the girl off of him and started to make his way toward me. I started to get extremely intimidated so I made a run for it. I heard Harry calling my name, but I didn't look back. I wiped away the tears that were running down my cheeks as I walked down the steps pulling out my cell phone ready to dial Ashton's number.

"Flo!" Harry yelled as he ran up to me. "What?" I said bitterly. "I'm so sorry. It's just that-" "Who is she?" I asked with my arms folded across my torso. He paused for a minute until he answered. "Valerie.. Valerie Lloyd." My heart started to race and I felt anger rush through my veins. "I thought you said you hated her!" I exclaimed. He didn't answer. Instead, he placed his hand on my shoulder making me yank away from his grip.

"Don't touch me!"I yelled as I put my phone back in my pocket. "I'm sorry-" "Lemme guess, you're back together with her right?" "No," he said innocently. "No? Then what was that back there? Huh?" "It was just a kiss,"Harry said raising his voice a little. "Just a kiss? I don't think so." "Well it was!"Harry boomed,"She even said that she wanted me back, Florence! Can you just be happy for me?" I felt my heart shatter into a million pieces at the simple statement and I didn't know what to say back.