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i was changed to a dress and a belt on my waist with thigh high socks.
i had five minutes before it was our turn to perform. i would say my headache has gone down but it was the complete opposite. my members were worried and told me not to perform but i couldn't do that to blinks. i couldn't just leave the group so i insist that i could perform.
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i should've stayed backstage and not performed, like my members said. my head was killing me. i was in excruciating pain. we are in the middle of performing and i couldn't handle the pain but i couldn't pass out here, it would be embarrassing. so i pushed on and kept doing my best.
we were now almost finished with our second song on stage and i was ready to pass out any second. but i knew we were almost done so i held on.
we strut our last pose and i had to close my eyes for a second as the lights went off. i bent down, exhausted. jisoo unnie saw and quickly held my hand and assisted me off stage where no one else could see. the moment we stepped off stage, i fell. i collapsed on the floor. i couldn't handle the pain. it was too much and my body was too exhausted to carry my own weight.
i could only hear people screaming my name as my ears were blocked. staffs gave me water and wiped my sweat that was dripping off my forehead.
in an hour, i was finally fine to walk again, but my head was still in pain but the show must go on.
we went to our dressing rooms and changed again.
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we walked back to our seats. our fellow idol stood up and gave us a small bow. both of my arms are held by lisa and jennie unnie as jisoo walked infront of us, assisting us. i could not keep my head up, so i kept it down but still bowed. as we reached our seats ikon showed me worried faces and asked if i was fine. i assume they saw what was happening. i gave them a quick nod and a small smile. i looked up and bts was looking at us. knowing that our fans was watching, i gave them a quick bow and sat down. i guess everyone saw me almost passing out on stage.
to say i was embarrassed was an understatement. i wasn't a rookie but i felt like what i did was unprofessional. but i kept my head up, acting like nothing happened as the ceremony was going on.
of course, my head still was in pain so i laid down my head on lisa's shoulder. now not caring if i was called rude. i was in pain and all that matters was it getting better. lisa gave me a little pat and helped me with the pain.
a few minutes later, our manager came to me with a staff and called me out, lending me a hand to hold in case i collapsed again. i held his arm gratefully and walked out, bowing to some idols who stood up.
we left the building and i couldn't hold my weight anymore and collapsed. not before the staff held me before falling fully on the floor. i smiled gratefully before fully going unconscious.
