Don't Let Me Fall (Emo Love Story)

Chapter 24

Ally's P.O.V.

At school the other kids kept staring and whispering about us it was really nerve racking its like we couldnt walk down the hall without people pointing at us and whispering amongst their friends, people would stop what they were doing to stare at us as we passed.
Keath didnt seem to notice..or he just didnt care the way I did. It bothered me I'm not used to people paying this much attention to me.
"Hey Ally." I heard my cousin Katie ask from behind me softly.
"What do you want?" I asked.
"Is Keath okay?" She asked.
"Ask him. Dont ask me like hes not here." I rolled my eyes.
"Dont need to be so mean Ally." Keath gave me this look that would make a mean dog run away with its tails between his legs.
It shocked me..hes never been like this the last month has been with him being sweet, kind, gentle, caring and filled with compliments...why the sudden change?
"Sorry...?" I said in more of a questioning tone.
"Thank you Keath...are you okay?" Katie asked Keath.
"Never better." He smiled warmly at her.
What the fuck...?
I didnt want to hear them anymore so I walked away and went to my next class. I sat in the classroom in the back hiding away from everyone...or trying, but once the other students walked in they looked at me...I couldnt tell what was in their eyes..was it pity? Was it fear...? What was it?
Finally Keath came into the classroom smiling and took a seat in front of the class...he didnt even notice me...usually he does, and he walks right to the back to sit with me...we would talk throughout class and joke around with each other, and now all of a sudden hes sitting up there and not noticing me at all.
I closed my eyes trying to hold back the tears, to fight back the voice in my head that wanted nothing more than to speak...to feed off this moment of weakness.
When lunch came around I was ready to scream and cry, he didnt wait for me outside the class...instead I found him surrounded by females. Girls that wouldnt have given him a second glance when school began.
I stood outside the group and not once had he noticed I was there, bit even when I walked away from them...I wasnt important to him anymore...I meant nothing to him now.

After school I found myself walking home alone. He had went with friends to a party that I wasnt invited to, he texted me letting me know but that's it, he didnt bother asking if I wanted to go.
Once I got into the house that Keath and I shared now I broke down. I couldn't stop crying no matter how hard I tried it just wasnt happening.
'Awww look at our poor Ally, no one cares, not Keath, no your family, no one."
I tried so hard to fight it to silence the voice but it was useless...I'm useless.
"That's the first correct thing you've said in the last month." The voice laughed.
Go away! I yelled in my head.
"I care for you Ally, I know what's best for you, I know what you deserve, I know everything about you." The voice said sympathetically.
What?
"There is a razor blade, it's the only friend you have." The voice said.
I shook my head and continued to cry, I cant do that. I've fought so hard to get where I fought so hard to get where I am.
Staring at the clock I watched the hours pass by slowly...by 4am I finally came to grips with the fact that Keath wasnt coming home, he was staying out for the night and possibly all day tomorrow.
I shut my eyes and laid down as my tears ran down my face softly once more.
For once the voice was right, he doesnt care, no one would. I was stupid enough to believe that he could love me, that he would choose me over everything. That I was the only one who had his full undivided attention.

I dont know what time I passed out at but I fell asleep only to be woken up at 7am stumbling in the front door, I walked out of the bedroom and went down the hall.
"Keath...?" I asked quietly.
"What do you want Ally?" Keath asked in annoyance.
"Did you have fun..?" I asked softly looking at my feet.
"Lots." Was all he said before he pushed past me and stumbled into the bedroom, shutting the door behind him, as if to stop me from entering.
I went to the couch and sat there hugging one of the couch pillows tightly to my chest, and began to cry, that pillow seemed to help me keep all the pieces glued together.