A Promise: BTS X READER

Part 18

"She hasn't told me yet. I'll tell her you asked."

This new information has caused a stir within you. All you can seem to feel now is insecurity, fear, anxiety. How could someone just mess with someone like that? You try to get up but almost lose your balance. Your sister pulls you back down before you seriously hurt yourself.

"What should I do?" You turn to your sister, hoping she will, for once, have something insightful to say.

"To be honest? I think you need to distance yourself from Jimin. If you really think about it, he's the one who has more to lose. He's a star -- billions of people know who he is. But who are you? Just some girl that stole him away."

You think about it for a moment. You really don't want to lose this man -- the man you've longed for for so long. You never even thought you'd ever see him in person until the day of the concert. And now, you'd held him in your arms and kissed his lips. You still had so much you wanted to experience with him. But would doing that while threatening his public image at the same time be fair to him? You lift your legs up onto the couch and to your chest, and you wrap your arms around them. Your chest starts to heave as you hold back tears. "You're totally right. I'm no one. I don't want to hurt his public image. I don't want to anger army. I-I have to slowly distance myself from him."

'Coming to this conclusion really fucking hurts. Why is the world like this? If no one knew Jimin, no one would care. Why can't we both just live in a world where only we two exist?' You let your legs slowly slide back down. You wipe your tears away while you try to bring your breathing back to normal. 'I suppose this means I have to cut myself off from all of BTS.'

You slowly get up off the couch, gripping one of the arms so you don't fall. Taking a deep breath, you walk into your room. Your phone is lighting up on your bedside table. As you get closer, Jimin's name catches your eye. You pick your phone up and open messenger. He's sent four messages.

They read:
"I had so much fun last night that I couldn't fall asleep cause I couldn't stop thinking about it."
"Did you sleep well? I hope so."
"I really miss you."
"Can I see you today?"

You reply, "I'm not feeling well. Sorry."

You turn the phone off and place it screenside down. You just know that if you seem Jimin reply you'll break and tell him what you're planning on doing. You lay down on your bed and bring your knees up close to your face and close your eyes. Maybe if you don't open them, the tears won't fall.

'I'm sorry Jimin. I'm so sorry. This is what's best for you. You'll understand... Please don't hate me.'