Puppetry - P.JM. [ON-HOLD]

Twenty-Four

I wiped my tears off my face, leaning against the hall's wall next to Taehyung's door. I was trying to keep myself quiet, taking a small sniff. My eyes burned from the tears, my body slightly shaking. I was already weak as it was, but shaking caused me to find something to balance myself against. My knees begged to give out, but I forced them to stay up.

I had left Jungkook behind at the data base, taking a carriage back to Taehyung's house despite the time of night it was. It was near zero-two-hundred, making me exhausted and a bit delirious. The carriage had taken me back to the house, the driver paying no attention to my quiet crying in the back. 

Now standing at Taehyung's bedroom door, I had a sinking feeling in my stomach. I didn't want to talk to Taehyung about my decision. I didn't want to give into words. I didn't want to leave behind what I already had as accomplishments, but at this point, I felt as if there was no hope left for me. If the head injury I had was so bad, I couldn't push myself to go back to working. I wouldn't be able to function.

I wanted to scream at myself. I wanted to scream to not give up and to keep going. I wanted to keep going and to stay standing. Instead of a scream escaping me, I gave a whine quietly, pressing the side of my head into the wall gently as I pressed my shoulder against it as hard as I could to relieve some stress I had left over. There was a lot of it.

My father's face kept flashing in my head, a look of harsh criticism on it. I knew why. He wanted me to keep going, to keep supporting myself. He wanted me to keep my head up. I wanted to listen to the face, but I couldn't seem to prove myself that I could follow the orders. I couldn't do anything. I was hopeless, useless. I was torn between myself. I was torn between giving up or continuing on with life.

I finally couldn't take it anymore. With the wall's help, I made my way slowly to Taehyung's door.

I didn't even bother knocking, but instead just opened it. The room was huge, even bigger than my own room. I had forgotten all of this.

The faint glow of a lantern sat next to Taehyung's bed, a little flame of contained fire lighting the room. The walls were a lighter gray, paintings of his past relatives here and there. One wall had a window for half of it, curtains pulled over it, but the shine of the moon still hung through it. Pieces of furniture were scattered about, the room only making them look smaller. Their colors matches the walls, the floor a white wood that was glossed over.

Taehyung's bed was huge, the covers black and white, designs only the top affluents would have. The headboard and structure of the bed was a wood to match the floor, carved and depicting abstract work that looked neat and clean. Taehyung laid in the middle of all of it, his brilliant red hair standing out the most from out of the covers.

Letting go from the wall, I walked into his room, my bare feet making no sounds against the wooden floor. I bit onto my lip hard enough to where I couldn't make a peep. My heart was thrumming in my chest. My head was becoming a bit lightheaded, but I ignored it as I kept walking along to go confront him.

Making it to the bed, my knees were going to give out at any second. I went over to the headboard, sliding onto the bed gently so I wouldn't fall down. I watched Taehyung as I sat there, trying to gather some courage to wake him up.

He was fast asleep, his red hair scattered on his pillow like a halo. I saw a peek of his shoulders and neck, catching the sight of his tattoos. I wanted to reach my hand out to touch his hair, but I kept myself back. That was a bad idea.

Instead(after a few minute) I reached out and shook his shoulder a bit, my heart now wanting to jump out of my chest to my throat. I released my lip, feeling how cold and dented it had gotten from my clenched teeth. "T-Taehyung . . . "