Broken // Zayn

Chapter Forty Five

45:

I sat down on the rock in front of the ocean with Zayn right beside me. I laid my head on his chest as he leaned back on another rock. "So you got the card?" I questioned. He forgot it in the car earlier and brought me over here to show me.

"Uh...yeah, I do." he nodded, sitting me up. "Do you mind if I just read it out loud? I thought I would feel better writing it down, but I think it's better and more meaningful to say it to you."

"Sure, go right ahead." I nodded, smiling.

Zayn cleared his throat and took a deep breath. He seemed really nervous and scared, so I placed my smaller hand on his shaky one for reassurance. "Okay, here it goes. 'Dear Hollister, I'm so happy that you found Harry at the beach a few weeks ago and that we mended our broken friendship. I wish you a very happy birthday because you deserve nothing less than the best. I know I've said plenty of things in the past that I know I had no business saying, but none of it was true.'"

He flipped his hand over under mine and grasped it gently as if he didn't want me to let go. My heart did a somersault. "'You're beautiful, intelligent, amazing, hysterical, and adorable. In the nine months without you, I felt empty and not the same. After knowing you for those three months, I realized that I need you back in my life.'" his eyes flickered to mine and then back to the card. "'I've denied a lot of things. Especially revolving around our relationship. To be 100% honest, I don't think I'll ever find a girl like you who will make my life feel complete like you did. Has anyone ever told you that I became a good different after I met you? They tell me that. They say that you bring out the silly in me. I say that you bring out the best in me.'" People have said that to me.

I stared into his eyes to try and figure out what he was thinking. "'These few months without you got me thinking. I thought I'd get over you. When you walked out on me, I thought I'd feel a billion times better. I should've believed you when you told me that you were innocent. I felt a billion times worse and I knew that I couldn't get you back at that time. I was once again alone. I like you, Holly. I liked you in August. I liked you in September. I liked you in October. I've always liked you, I just never wanted to admit it because you rejected me twice. Perrie was a major distraction and I felt terrible for accidentally using her. But you're the one that I want. I-I'm in love with you.'"

His pretty brown eyes were on my blue ones now. My body felt numb and I could hear my heart beating in my chest thunderously. He liked me all that time, and still dated Perrie? What the other guys were saying was true? Zayn took my other hand in his as I probably looked like a fish, trying to comprehend what just happened.

"'I don't know how many of our songs I need to sing to let you know how serious I am. You may or may not feel the same way, but all I know is that I've been trying to get you off my mind and trying to date other girls, but you always end up being my phone background again. Always end up being my number one search on Twitter to see how you've been. Always end up being the last thought on my mind before I go to bed. There's no reason to fight it now that we're back in each other's lives.'" Zayn said. I was so close to tears. "'There were many times were I was just sitting there and wondering how you were doing. What would happen if I texted you. My mind always manages to drift back to you and I can't help it'."

"Zayn--"

"Wait, it's almost done." he told me, ready to finish the card. A tear rolled down my cheek and he brought his thumb to my face to wipe it away gently. "'A year ago today, I was doing the same thing as I'm doing right now. Except this time, it's much more stronger. I understand if you want to say no and be friends. Essentially, what I'm trying to say here, is that I love you. I love you so very much and I want Zaylister to be real, after all this time of me pretending that I didn't want you. Hollister, will you be my girlf--'"