Just For The Summer: Book One

Present Day: Rooben

I snap back to reality as Elena tugs on y hand.

'Hey, are you okay?' she asks, looking at me as I stare into the abyss of nothingness.

I nod and say to her, 'you know when i first landed in London I got lost and I made my first friend right where we are standing... Her name was Evangeline Shaun Sampson and she was old and poor but damn it, she was the nicest person I have ever met. She loved me more than my parents ever did.'

Elena takes my cheek into her hand and looks into my eyes. 'Is she...?' She asks softly and I nod.

'She died last year...' I trail off as I am bombarded with memories of Evangeline bringing chocolate chip cookies to the all boys boarding school my parents forced me to go to. Evangeline sending me birthday cards every single birthday and christmas presents every single year. Evangeline making sure I was okay and had everything I needed for school and life and everything. She was my family. She has a grandaughter...' I pause, I can't tell her about Eloise so I try and change the subject, 'Evangeline was everything to me.'

'You must have really loved her... She was really important to you.'

I nod. It's true. She was the most important woman to me. That is, before I met Elena. I decide to tell Elena the truth about last year.

"Last year was really hard for me. After Evangeline died I needed something. I has this void. I needed to fill it. She was like family, a rock. She cared about me Elena. She really cared and I didn't know what to do. I turned to drugs and alcohol to numb the pain. Girls too. I slept around a lot. I just... I needed to feel whole you know. I needed something. I just kept partying and fucking and doing everything I could to destroy myself.'

Elena looks away and for a minute I think she's disgusted with me and will never talk to me again and nev-

'I get it. I understand Rooben and there is nothing wrong with it. We all grieve in our own way... Is this why you came back to Canada?'

This isn't the reason but the truth is far too complicated so I just nod anyway. This isn't exactly lie but it's not the truth.

We both walk back inside Selhurst station and take the train back to Victoria to grab some lunch and take an afternoon nap.