Lost life

Apologize

"You're ugly." Day by day. "Aren't you embarrassed to walk around like that?" More cracks were made into Jimin's heart. "You look fat." More insecurities came up. "You're height makes you look nonexistent." He tried to swallow it. "Since when are pigs allowed to walk around freely?" But feelings he liked to hide, came up. "I hate you." And all that caused by only one person. Yoongi.

It was nearly daily, when Jimin and Yoongi began to meet by chance. And it was nearly daily, when Jimin began to break under Yoongi. Insults were thrown at him. At first, Jimin ignored it, minding his own business. Though after some time happened something, he let his mind permit something, he shouldn't have. He started to think about every single insult thrown at him.

He got more insecure over his body, more insecure over everything. He started to lock himself up and thought about his past.

It was only a question of time, when Jimin started to tear old wounds open. Memories from his parents and Jungkook made his heart pound with distress. He tried not to think back at his childhood, but couldn't help himself.

Every night when he thought about that, his nails sank into his skin. Every night when he thought about that, tears shined in his eyes. Every night when he thought about that, his body began to shake. And every night when he thought about that, his memories became his new nightmare.

Even if everything seems to be alright in the morning, by being woken up by a light and peaceful voice, the day and the night would tear him down again. And Jimin tried not to show anyone around him his best, but his face faded slowly. Every time he saw Yoongi, his ability to smile vanished bit by bit. Jimin noticed it himself, as well as the three other people around him. Though, they didn't know anything about what Yoongi did. Jimin kept it to himself, not sharing how he suffered with the others. He hated being a bother to them, walking up to them by every problem which occurred with Yoongi. So for them not to find out what was actually going on, Jimin was distancing himself. He bearly saw them around, only in classes they had together. He even escaped Hoseok so often, by excuses to study or anything else. But he never did study in any time.

He locked himself up thinking about how worthless he was, according to Yoongi's words. And how his parents hated him. How Jungkook added more into Jimin's childhood.

It became a daily routine for Jimin.

That was, until Yoongi was especially upset one day and went further than he did before.

After classes, Jimin practically ran out of university, so he could avoid anyone talking to him. Making his way through the dark and empty street, with his hood up and head hanging low, he bumped into someone again. Jimin wished it was only someone. His hands began to shake, as he heard his voice.

"Apologize.", came from the other. Jimin's eyes slowly came up to meet Yoongi's angry ones. "Are you deaf or? Apologize.", came in a quiet and threating voice. "Sorry.", muttered Jimin. "What?" "I said sorry.", said Jimin in a stronger voice. "Oh, are you dumb?" Yoongi's hand went up to Jimin's shoulder, holding it in a bone crushing grip. "Apologize again then.", Yoongi ordered him to do. "I did once, I think it's enough." The slight annoyance in Jimin's voice was heard by Yoongi. He pushed Jimin against the street light, making his back hit it hard. "You think that? Let me tell you something wannabe." Yoongi grabbed his collar, pushing Jimin against the street light again. He hissed in pain, but Yoongi couldn't care less. "Nothing you will ever do, nothing you will ever be, will be enough. Keep that in mind, little twerp.", whispered Yoongi into his ear. "Understood?", he asked sharply and Jimin nodded quickly. "So tell me, what did you want to say?"

"I'm sorry.", said Jimin with the urge to cry. "You said what?", mocked Yoongi. "I'm sorry.", said Jimin louder. "I didn't hear it. Say it louder." But this time, Jimin kept his mouth close.