Summer for Suckers

8.)

Two weeks later, Shawn's family ends up coming home early from London. He leaves the hotel he was sharing with Mat and Cody and goes home. When his parents ask him about Gabe, and about you, he says nothing.

What could he possibly say?

Gabe hasn't spoken to Shawn since that night of the pool party. According to Zach, he saw Gabe and Jacob run into each other in the parking lot of the gym, and Gabe didn't hesitate - he decked Jacob square in the face, knocking him to the ground in one punch before getting in his car and leaving. From what you could interpret, no one seemed to help Jacob either.

Gabe also made a promise to spend the rest of the summer with you, an opportunity for you both to get closer as siblings, one, so you didn't feel alone, and two, to spend time together before he goes back to school in the fall.

He's also become extra protective - he doesn't like if you just go out with Annie, Morgan, and Kayla anymore, saying that he feels a lot better when one of your guy friends is there with you, especially Willy.

You haven't fought him on it, haven't really had the energy to.

This wasn't what you expected at all, and trying to get a grasp on the situation, trying to accept the fact that Shawn played you, it wasn't easy.

Just hours before it was revealed to you that it was all a lie, he had been inside you for the first time. He had made love to you, told you that he was in love with you, and it was all a lie.

All of it. You were nothing more than five hundred dollars to him.

You spent hours scrubbing your skin under scalding hot water, hoping to erase the memory of Shawn, but each time you dried off, you could still feel the ghost of his touch. This body, your body, felt alien to you, and when you looked in the mirror, you could barely recognize yourself.

You were never this torn up over Brady, or Willy.

The scent of Shawn was still on your pillows and sheets, so you bought a brand new bed set, folding up the old one and hiding it away in the hall closet with all the other extra blankets and pillows. Once Shawn moved all of his stuff out, you locked the door to his room, shutting the memory of him away as best as possible.

But it was still no use. You felt the absence of him everywhere. This was the boy you fell for the fastest, the one you let in the easiest because you knew each other the best. You thought he wanted you, thought he loved you, thought you meant something to him.

You're just a sucker for love. You tell yourself. A pathetic sucker.

-

The car is quiet as you and Gabe drive, the night time air blowing through the car, and you sigh, watching how the street lights illuminate the shops downtown. They're as vacant as you feel.

"Mom and dad come home next week, right?" He asks, and you nod your head, not looking at him.

"Yep, on Wednesday night."

He murmurs his agreement, and silence falls on the car again.

"I'm really sorry." Gabe says suddenly, and you stare at him.

"What?"

Gabe takes a glance at you before focusing on the road. "I'm sorry about Shawn, about Jacob, about everything. I'm sorry that I couldn't stop it, Guppy."

"Don't call me that." You spit, pausing when you see a flash of pain on his face. "Why do you call me that anyway?"

He gives a small smile at the memory in his head. "When mom first told me that I was gonna be a big brother, the way she did it was that she showed me the ultrasound, and said that the baby was the size of a guppy. Mom and dad kept calling you that - whenever they talked about the baby, they would call you 'Guppy,' because they wanted the sex of the baby to be a surprise. And then when you were born, you were so small, it just stuck."