Islands in the Sky

2.13

“Perhaps that wouldn’t be best for me,” Cassa said, after a moment. “To prevent the wedding. Have you considered that?”

“You seemed quite definite on it a moment ago.”

“Not definite, just annoyed.”

“Petulant.”

Cassa shrugged. “Perhaps. But then I considered. You think this wedding is best for me, and I have trusted your judgement all my life, so perhaps I am wrong. Perhaps you are right. So I shall do it. I agree.”

“But the wedding isn’t what you want,” her grandmother said. “So no matter how reasonable, you should do your utmost to prevent it.”

“Simply because it isn’t what I want?”

“Of course.”

“That seems foolish,” Cassa said. “If it might actually be best for me.”

“I cannot see how what’s best matters.”

“You cannot. I can.”

“No child,” her grandmother said. “You should oppose me if I displease you. You should oppose any who do. It is your birthright.”

“Not you.”

“Even me.”

“No,” Cassa said. “Not me. Not like that. Not like I will have to.”

Her grandmother thought for a moment.

“I told you this,” Cassa said. “I told you long ago. I’m not going to do that. To inherit the way you wish me to. No matter how much you push me. No matter how much you want me to. I will not.”

“It is how I took the tower from my mother.”

“I know. And tradition is wonderful and makes us all feel warm and happy at night.”

“That tradition is the law,” her grandmother said, a little sharply.

“Which I also know. But I’m still not going to.”

Her grandmother looked at her for a moment, and then nodded again. “Very well.”

“And besides,” Cassa said, and looked across at the bread and cheese. “That knife is too obvious.” Now she had thought that, she realized it was true. “It’s so obvious, sitting there, that it must be harmless and dull.”

“You have hands. You have feet.”

“And I have the surprise of a dull knife, as I cut at a snake.”

Her grandmother smiled.

“I won’t,” Cassa said. “I refuse. Even now. Even today, with what you’re making me do. I won’t do as you wish.”

Her grandmother nodded, and seemed a little disappointed. “Very well, girl,” she said. “Then go.”

That seemed to be that. Cassa was dismissed. Cassa hesitated, all the same. She was curious, and it was her wedding day, so she felt she could ask.

“Did you honestly wish me to?” Cassa said. “To try and solve matters that way?”

Her grandmother looked at the door. Cassa was still holding it slightly ajar. There were people out in the hallway, the guards and retainers, and also visitors waiting to attend her grandmother before the wedding.

“Did you?” Cassa said again. She left the door open. She didn’t especially care who overheard.

“I did.”

“You truly did? Even at such a cost to yourself?

“Even so.”

“But now? With no warning. Before you’re ready to go? And perhaps before I am ready to lead?”

“You will be ready if you do this. And I already have all the warning I need.”

“But I would be killing you,” Cassa said, surprised. “Is that not… something of a nuisance?”

Her grandmother smiled. A smile with actual affection, the fondness they always had for one another, despite these schemes and struggles and squabbles.

“It would be a nuisance,” her grandmother said. “Yes.”

“I imagine,” Cassa said. “Terribly so.”

“But all the same, I wished you to try,” her grandmother said. “Although, perhaps not to succeed.”

Cassa smiled too.

“It is a test,” her grandmother said. “It is our way. One day you must.”

“Or let you die in your bed.”

“And know that I will give the tower to another.”

Cassa thought. She had thought this out before. She thought carefully again. “No,” she said slowly, after a moment. “No you won’t. Not if I am otherwise the most capable.”

“Perhaps,” her grandmother said. “You take a risk though.”

“I am happy with that.”

They looked at each other, and Cassa felt fond of her grandmother again. She felt close, their bond restored.

“Now was that all?” her grandmother said, overly sharp, pretending a little, most likely. “You’ve said what you must? You’ve finished all your chattering for the time being?”

“I have, mistress,” Cassa said.

“Then go and make ready to be wed.”

Cassa nodded.

“Go,” her grandmother said. “Before I have you carried there.”